Have a happy period!

Indian Princess · Post by **Indian Princess** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 5:22 pm

Vote her President!!!!!

I LOVED IT LMAO:wah::wah:

RedGlitter · Post by **RedGlitter** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 7:07 pm

Aww it ain't that bad.....

But this was pretty funny....

I can't tell you how safe and secure

I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants. :wah: :wah: :wah:

Indian Princess · Post by **Indian Princess** » Fri Sep 14, 2007 7:26 pm

Aint that bad did I hear you say RED?

Here lets switch bodies for a month ok. Then you will know what the term postal means.:wah:

pinkchick · Post by **pinkchick** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 9:54 am

AngelEyes82;694631 wrote: This is an actual letter sent to American company Proctor and Gamble

regarding their feminine products. She really gets rolling after the first paragraph...

Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your "Always" maxi pads for over 20 years and I

appreciate many of their features. Why, without the Leak Guard Core or Dri-Weave

absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or salsa dancing, and

I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down the beach in tight, white shorts.

But my favorite feature has to be your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on

being the only company smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi pads be

aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure

I feel each month knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from "the curse"?

I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my "time of the month" is starting right now.

As I type, I can already feel hormonal forces violently surging through my body.

Just a few minutes from now, my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into

what my husband likes to call "an inbred hillbilly with knife skills."

Isn't the human body amazing?

As Brand Manager in the Feminine-Hygiene Division, you've no doubt seen quite

a bit of research on what exactly happens during your customers' monthly visits

from "Aunt Flo". Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and

cramping we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and out-of-control

behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most women. In fact, only last week,

my friend Jennifer fought the violent urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a

George Foreman Grill just because he told her he thought

Grey's Anatomy was written by drunken chimps. Crazy!

The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is

just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants...

Which brings me to the reason for my letter.

Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted to reach

inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi-pad, and there,

printed on the adhesive backing, were these words: "Have a Happy Period."

Are you fu*ing kidding me? What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager

brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness is possible during a

menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James?

FYI, unless you're some kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything

"happy" about a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and

lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local Walgreen's

armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out, man! If you just have to slap a moronic

message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say something that's actually

pertinent, like "Put down the Hammer" or "Vehicular Manslaughter is Wrong", or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your Accounting Department that, effective immediately,

there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for I have chosen to take my maxi-pad

business elsewhere. And though I will certainly miss your Flex-Wings, I will not for one

minute miss your brand of condescending bull sh*t. And that's a promise I will keep. Always.

Very good:wah:

kazalala · Post by **kazalala** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 1:01 pm

pinkchick;695671 wrote: Very good:wah:

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl I have just snorted wine out of my nose

WonderWendy3 · Post by **WonderWendy3** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 1:06 pm

Oh I thought it was great! I couldn't have said any better myself! :wah::wah:

Imladris · Post by **Imladris** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 1:12 pm

Fabulous!!! I soooo get that whole 'hate the world' thing. I used to tell my husband that 'Just because you are ****************** doesn't mean I'm due on' followed by 'Oh, you're right here we go again'

Hysterectomy - end of periods, wonderful:D

Kathy Ellen · Post by **Kathy Ellen** » Mon Sep 17, 2007 3:09 pm

Angel, That's the best.....glad I'm over that period.:guitarist Happy days are here again.......

Imladris · Post by **Imladris** » Tue Sep 18, 2007 8:33 am

magenta flame;695842 wrote: soon very soon!:)

Good for you, one word of advice - rest afterwards, you will need to.

Hope it goes well.:-4