Irish Sadness

[Bryn Mawr]

AE's thread about homesickness remined me of one of the more powerful songs about the results of the Famine and the way it split families.



It relates the story found in a set of letters that formed part of an old man's effects when he died :-

Kilkelly, Ireland, 18 and 60, my dear and loving son John

Your good friend the schoolmaster Pat McNamara's so good

As to write these words down.

Your brothers have all gone to find work in England,

The house is so empty and sad

The crop of potatoes is sorely infected,

A third to a half of them bad.

And your sister Brigid and Patrick O'Donnell

Are going to be married in June.

Your mother says not to work on the railroad

And be sure to come on home soon.



Kilkelly, Ireland, 18 and 70, dear and loving son John

Hello to your Mrs and to your 4 children,

May they grow healthy and strong.

Michael has got in a wee bit of trouble,

I guess that he never will learn.

Because of the dampness there's no turf to speak of

And now we have nothing to burn.

And Brigid is happy, you named a child for her

And now she's got six of her own.

You say you found work, but you don't say

What kind or when you will be coming home.



Kilkelly, Ireland, 18 and 80, dear Michael and John, my sons

I'm sorry to give you the very sad news

That your dear old mother has gone.

We buried her down at the church in Kilkelly,

Your brothers and Brigid were there.

You don't have to worry, she died very quickly,

Remember her in your prayers.

And it's so good to hear that Michael's returning,

With money he's sure to buy land

For the crop has been poor and the people

Are selling at any price that they can.



Kilkelly, Ireland, 18 and 90, my dear and loving son John

I guess that I must be close on to eighty,

It's thirty years since you're gone.

Because of all of the money you send me,

I'm still living out on my own.

Michael has built himself a fine house

And Brigid's daughters have grown.

Thank you for sending your family picture,

They're lovely young women and men.

You say that you might even come for a visit,

What joy to see you again.



Kilkelly, Ireland, 18 and 92, my dear brother John

I'm sorry that I didn't write sooner to tell you that father passed on.

He was living with Brigid, she says he was cheerful

And healthy right down to the end.

Ah, you should have seen him play with

The grandchildren of Pat McNamara, your friend.

And we buried him alongside of mother,

Down at the Kilkelly churchyard.

He was a strong and a feisty old man,

Considering his life was so hard.

And it's funny the way he kept talking about you,

He called for you in the end.

Oh, why don't you think about coming to visit,

We'd all love to see you again.

[Kathy Ellen]

That was a very sad time indeed Bryn, very sad. That's a beautiful song...thanks for sharing. I will look for that song.

Did you see "Dancing at Laghnasa?" That was a very sad movie about a family in Donegal.

My Dad had to immigrate to Glasgow and then the States when he was 19 yrs. old...broke his heart..had to leave behind his only brother and all of his family.

I miss my family in Ireland so much...haven't been home since 2004. Hopefully plan to visit during the summer of 2009 and may also visit Cornwall and London if possible. Soooo, you guys better watch out....I may call on you:-4

[Bryn Mawr]

Kathy Ellen;721776 wrote: That was a very sad time indeed Bryn, very sad. That's a beautiful song...thanks for sharing. I will look for that song.

Did you see "Dancing at Laghnasa?" That was a very sad movie about a family in Donegal.

My Dad had to immigrate to Glasgow and then the States when he was 19 yrs. old...broke his heart..had to leave behind his only brother and all of his family.

I miss my family in Ireland so much...haven't been home since 2004. Hopefully plan to visit during the summer of 2009 and may also visit Cornwall and London if possible. Soooo, you guys better watch out....I may call on you:-4


I'm not much of a one for films - too short an attention span

I think many, many Isrish families have been broken up in this way.

Look forward to seeing you when you come over :-6

[Kathy Ellen]

Thanks Bryn,

Hope I do make it to the UK and meet some of the FG'ers.

[Galbally]

Yeah its certainly a big part of the Irish physche, the theme of immigration away from poverty, lonlieness, and the loss of generations of people to America, Britain, Australia or the rest. Though that situation has completely turned on its head in the last 15 years as Ireland has developed economically, which although its very positive, is also a bit strange as its such a sea-change from the harsh realities of the past.

For me its also a bit different, as I was born in England, and I immigrated to Ireland in 1980 when me parents decided to go home because Maggie closed down the British car industry and my dad was a shop steward in British Leyland, so I was kinda an Irish immigrant in reverse. Still, it all worked out OK in the end! A lot of my family do still live in England though and like all Irish families we have loads of relations in America, and Australia as well, but thats also true for Scots, Welsh, and quite a few English as well.

[Nomad]

Realizing the circumstances are very different aside from sons and fathers being what they are in many families mine included these letters reminded me of the Cats In The Cradle lyrics.

Poignant always.

To me anyhow.



Cats In The Cradle by Harry Chapin

My child arrived just the other day

He came to the world in the usual way

But there were planes to catch and bills to pay

He learned to walk while I was away

And he was talkin' 'fore I knew it, and as he grew

He'd say "I'm gonna be like you dad

You know I'm gonna be like you"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon

Little boy blue and the man on the moon

When you comin' home dad?

I don't know when, but we'll get together then son

You know we'll have a good time then

My son turned ten just the other day

He said, "Thanks for the ball, Dad, come on let's play

Can you teach me to throw", I said "Not today

I got a lot to do", he said, "That's ok"

And he walked away but his smile never dimmed

And said, "I'm gonna be like him, yeah

You know I'm gonna be like him"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon

Little boy blue and the man on the moon

When you comin' home son?

I don't know when, but we'll get together then son

You know we'll have a good time then

Well, he came home from college just the other day

So much like a man I just had to say

"Son, I'm proud of you, can you sit for a while?"

He shook his head and said with a smile

"What I'd really like, Dad, is to borrow the car keys

See you later, can I have them please?"

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon

Little boy blue and the man on the moon

When you comin' home son?

I don't know when, but we'll get together then son

You know we'll have a good time then

I've long since retired, my son's moved away

I called him up just the other day

I said, "I'd like to see you if you don't mind"

He said, "I'd love to, Dad, if I can find the time

You see my new job's a hassle and kids have the flu

But it's sure nice talking to you, Dad

It's been sure nice talking to you"

And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me

He'd grown up just like me

My boy was just like me

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon

Little boy blue and the man on the moon

When you comin' home son?

I don't know when, but we'll get together then son

You know we'll have a good time then

[Bryn Mawr]

Nomad;721964 wrote: Realizing the circumstances are very different aside from sons and fathers being what they are in many families mine included these letters reminded me of the Cats In The Cradle lyrics.

Poignant always.

To me anyhow.






Too true.



Can anyone listen to that without being affected?

[Kathy Ellen]

I love that song Nomad. My family used to sing it at our sing -a- longs. It's a lovely and a thoughtful song.

[Nomad]

Kathy Ellen;721975 wrote: I love that song Nomad. My sing it at our sing a longs. It's a lovely and so true song.






Dads can be really difficult for sons. Its one of those things I dont know how to define.

I could sure use some healing at the moment though.

Before its too late.

[Kathy Ellen]

Nomad;721979 wrote: Dads can be really difficult for sons. Its one of those things I dont know how to define.

I could sure use some healing at the moment though.

Before its too late.


I'm so sorry Nomad:-4 Hope things work out...can you talk to him about it? My Dad was difficult also. I know he loved me but never spend quality time with his kids. As an adult I tried to get him to go fishing with just me, but it never happened.....so sad.

[Nomad]

Kathy Ellen;721993 wrote: I'm so sorry Nomad:-4 Hope things work out...can you talk to him about it? My Dad was difficult also. I know he loved me but never spend quality time with his kids. As an adult I tried to get him to go fishing with just me, but it never happened.....so sad.




Hes happy with his life the way it is. He doesnt like complications. Gotta deal with it.