Decreasing your risk of divorce

minks · Post by **minks** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 11:50 am

Chances are, we all know someone who is divorced -- probably several someones. In 2000, there were over 957,200 finalized divorces in the United States. The U.S. Census Bureau says that 50 percent of all marriages entered into today will end in divorce. That's a lot of broken homes, heartaches and paperwork, not to mention money spent on attorney fees and court costs.

But, some say those percentages of future doomed marriages have to be interpreted based on other factors. Barbara Whitehead and David Popenoe's "The State of Our Unions" (2004), which was prepared at Rutgers University for the National Marriage Project, says that there are several important social factors that affect that 50 percent estimate. For example, your risk of divorce decreases by:

30 percent if your annual income is more than $50,000

24 percent if you had a baby more than seven months after you got married

24 percent if you were over 25 when you got married

14 percent if your own parents never divorced

14 percent if you go to church as a family

13 percent if you attended some college

I find that hard to belive because according to those stats, I would have a 126% chance of never divorcing then. Ahahahahahaha

capt_buzzard · Post by **capt_buzzard** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 12:10 pm

A Complete breakdown of family life.The kids suffer most

Rapunzel · Post by **Rapunzel** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:13 pm

While I don't think people should be forced to stay together if things truly aren't working out, I do feel they should at least have a damn good try to sort things out before they part, for the sake of the children at least. I'm not commenting on anyone here but on my best friend who kicked her husband out because he had a brief affair. I'm not condoning him by any means, but if my other half had a fling I think it would be worth talking it through and attempting a reconciliation, rather than dump him (because I know I would still love him, despite the pain) and i know the kids love their daddy.

My friend 'dated' a lot of men in the first year following her separation. She now lives with a chap with a son whose mother also has another child by another man and is now living with a third man. My friends ex also has a girlfriend with a baby on the way. So many babies...who belong to separated parents...and no-one feels they really belong. Half brothers, step sisters, my mum is your mum but my dad is his dad not yours! No wonder the poor kids are confused! Especially when ex's start badmouthing each other and the kids dont know whom to take for a role model.

I'm not criticising anyone, I'm just saying I wish people would consider their childrens welfare before they decide to bed hop. They might get a quick screw but the kids get totally screwed! Sorry for the language and the rant!

john8pies · Post by **john8pies** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:26 pm

The mere word divorce has been outrageous to Catholics for ever.

minks · Post by **minks** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:29 pm

Oh I have so many opinions on Divorce but my time here comes to an end. Enjoy your weekend gang I am off till monday.

Keep happy

M

nvalleyvee · Post by **nvalleyvee** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 3:34 pm

capt_buzzard wrote: A Complete breakdown of family life.The kids suffer most

The kids only suffer if the parents put them in the middle of their stupid fight for control. My ex - and daughter's father - are still friends. We swore to raise her together even though we were divorced. The kid never got to play us and was raised by two parents. He and I are still friends today - just couldn't figure out how to make it work when we were younger. He has always been a loving and supportive father - even paid his child support. I didn't collect child support when she had her visitations because I thought he needed the money to care for her. SOOOO what I'm saying is that the kids don't have to suffer if the parents can be adults and not involve them in the rift of divorce.

cars · Post by **cars** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 4:45 pm

minks wrote: Chances are, we all know someone who is divorced -- probably several someones. In 2000, there were over 957,200 finalized divorces in the United States. The U.S. Census Bureau says that 50 percent of all marriages entered into today will end in divorce. That's a lot of broken homes, heartaches and paperwork, not to mention money spent on attorney fees and court costs.

But, some say those percentages of future doomed marriages have to be interpreted based on other factors. Barbara Whitehead and David Popenoe's "The State of Our Unions" (2004), which was prepared at Rutgers University for the National Marriage Project, says that there are several important social factors that affect that 50 percent estimate. For example, your risk of divorce decreases by:

30 percent if your annual income is more than $50,000

24 percent if you had a baby more than seven months after you got married

24 percent if you were over 25 when you got married

14 percent if your own parents never divorced

14 percent if you go to church as a family

13 percent if you attended some college

I find that hard to belive because according to those stats, I would have a 126% chance of never divorcing then. Ahahahahahaha

It has been said that it would be a good idea for people to get a "learners permit" instead of a marriage license. Also, to refrane from having children for the first 5 or so years. So that if the need arose to cancel the permit within that period, no children would be involved/hurt!!! Too bad it can't be that way!!!

capt_buzzard · Post by **capt_buzzard** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 4:48 pm

john8pies wrote: The mere word divorce has been outrageous to Catholics for ever.No Longer in holy catholic Ireland. Divorce is now legal here. The People have spoken.

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 5:19 pm

I agree, cars, there should be a learners permit for marriage!

capt_buzzard · Post by **capt_buzzard** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 5:24 pm

Peg wrote: I agree, cars, there should be a learners permit for marriage!I agree with that too.

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Fri Jun 03, 2005 5:30 pm

It really would have saved me a lot of mental and physical pain. My first husband and I would have lasted a week instead of 3 1/2 years!