D-Day

koan · Post by **koan** » Mon Jun 06, 2005 7:02 pm

If she is going through a selfish "discovery" phase I hope she is wise enough to let the kids be with you. A friend of mine is finally getting one of his two sons after two years. The youngest has been left alone in the middle of nowhere (extremely remote house) for entire nights having to make his own dinners at eleven years old while his mom is out at the bar with her new ten years younger boyfriend. As far as we can tell she only kept them for the child support, which she didn't spend on the children.

Hopefully your situation isn't this bad and you can feel better knowing it could have been worse.

BTW congrats for making it through a difficult phase!

mominiowa · Post by **mominiowa** » Mon Jun 06, 2005 7:14 pm

Ups and downs..sadness and happiness..I wanted him back - I wanted to kill him.(Sorry LC) LOL I NEEDED him...I never wanted to see him again..I went as far as to tell my new dating friend that I still loved my X crazy spouse..So EVERYTHING u are feeling.... is SOOOOOOO normal..Just one word of advice..DON'T JUMP INTO BED WITH HER THE DAY u sign papers! :-5 It only hurst worse..Yes mom was a scared physco x-wife..and dumb to boot at one point!! LOL Good Luck - you can do this...but let someone know your feelings -don't keep them inside..even if it is to us!! :-4

turbonium · Post by **turbonium** » Mon Jun 06, 2005 9:55 pm

That is tough - all this time to have your first broken heart must really be devastating. You have no past experience to draw on.

If the marriage was a competition more than a partnership, maybe she felt she was becoming inadequate compared to you as your career becomes more successful.. Or maybe she saw you becoming pre-occupied with buiding your business at the cost of the relationship.

At any rate, I hope all works out the best for all of you after the dust settles!

john8pies · Post by **john8pies** » Tue Jun 07, 2005 4:16 am

Thanks for the news. I wish you and your kids all the best. Go easy in that fast car though!

Agnes · Post by **Agnes** » Tue Jun 07, 2005 6:04 am

you will find another love shortly, its summer and love is in the air! :-6

greydeadhead · Post by **greydeadhead** » Tue Jun 07, 2005 7:02 am

Hang in there NewLife. You sound like you have a pretty good handle on where youwant to go and what you want to do. I hope you do get the kids.. as has been stated already in this thread it sounds like your soon to be X is on a find myself mission. Unfortunately this is a common occurance, especially when they feel like they have been the ones doing the child raising and all that. In some instances it is a valid excuse, but most of the time it is an escape from responsiblity. No worries.. you will be better off for it soon.. Good luck and be well...

Jives · Post by **Jives** » Tue Jun 07, 2005 7:11 am

anewlife wrote: The funny thing is I think it's for the better, but my ego says - she found someone better, or thinks she can?

Yeah, that's the tough part of a divorce alright...the feeling of rejection. Don't torture yourself, it's not that way, it just didn't work out, that's all.

This is my first broken heart.

Huh? How did you skate through high school woithout one, you lucky dog! It does hurt like a b1tch, though. It took me over a year to be myself, and another 8 years to feel like dating again.

Anyway - I am buying myself a really fast expensive car, buidling my business and moving forward. I have my eye on a nice townhome on the water and I will work my $ss off to get it. Kids are doing well - and to be frank (and why not) - I think I'll end up with them (I can only hope!)

Now that's the spirit! Go get 'em, Tiger!:D

as my ex may be "finding herself" in Tibet or some other country.

Thanks all. :driving:

Most likely, she'll be finding herself in the Twilight Zone of self doubt and recrimination.