sad new year

lemon_and_mint · Post by **lemon_and_mint** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:01 pm

3 hours till the new year and i've just had news that my mothers sister has died.

I didn't know her, they had only just found each other after a lifetime apart and were going to meet next year. She had two brothers who died about a year before she found them as well.

How incredibly sad.:-1 They all just missed meeting up. :-1

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:02 pm

Theres a valuable lesson in there for all.

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:03 pm

L&M so sorry to hear this very sad news. :-1

lemon_and_mint · Post by **lemon_and_mint** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:04 pm

that's like a cruel joke by the universe, isn't it?

Chezzie · Post by **Chezzie** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:05 pm

best wishes to you and your family Lemon...sad news all round x

lemon_and_mint · Post by **lemon_and_mint** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:09 pm

i cant decide if it would have been better if she had never found them in the first place, than to miss them like that.

chonsigirl · Post by **chonsigirl** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:10 pm

Thinking of your family, lemon.

kinks · Post by **kinks** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:13 pm

So sorry to hear that lemon.....bist wishes and love to you and your family :yh_hugs:yh_hugs:yh_hugs

CARLA · Post by **CARLA** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:17 pm

L&M I have to think knowing is always better. She didn't get to meet with them but she talked to them right?? That is something in and of itself. :-4

[QUOTE]i cant decide if it would have been better if she had never found them in the first place, than to miss them like that.[/QUOTE]

Pheasy · Post by **Pheasy** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:18 pm

That is so very sad Lemon :-1

Do you mind me asking how they got seperated - did they ever know each other? :-4

lemon_and_mint · Post by **lemon_and_mint** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:28 pm

ThePheasant;751253 wrote: That is so very sad Lemon :-1

Do you mind me asking how they got seperated - did they ever know each other? :-4

its a long story, basically my mother was one of three children from her mothers second marriage, but they did not know that their mother had been married before and had children, so i suppose these were her stepbrothers and sisters, but still family to her, as one of her "real" brothers died young as well.

It was only after my grandmother died and my sister was researching the family tree that this was found - i suppose none of my grandmothers other relatives wanted to say as they thought if she wanted them to know, she would have told them.

It was only about August this year that she made contact with her sister, who was in her 80s and could not travel, they were going to meet after new year when my mother could travel to her.The brothers were dead last year before she made contact with her sister.

Just incredibly sad and i have no idea why they werent told.(although my sister said that the records show that the my mothers father - her second husband - is either the brother or son of her first husband - im not sure that can be right)

Pheasy · Post by **Pheasy** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:52 pm

lemon_and_mint;751262 wrote: its a long story, basically my mother was one of three children from her mothers second marriage, but they did not know that their mother had been married before and had children, so i suppose these were her stepbrothers and sisters, but still family to her, as one of her "real" brothers died young as well.

It was only after my grandmother died and my sister was researching the family tree that this was found - i suppose none of my grandmothers other relatives wanted to say as they thought if she wanted them to know, she would have told them.

It was only about August this year that she made contact with her sister, who was in her 80s and could not travel, they were going to meet after new year when my mother could travel to her.The brothers were dead last year before she made contact with her sister.

Just incredibly sad and i have no idea why they werent told.(although my sister said that the records show that the my mothers father - her second husband - is either the brother or son of her first husband - im not sure that can be right)

This is really sad. I was reading a post earlier which, at some point, was questioning if a parent should tell a child certain things. There were debates about honesty, and debates about reasoning. I don't know why they were not told, it is very sad because they missed out on so much. But I guess the parents decided for what ever reason that it was the right thing at the time.

Still very sad for your Mum Lemon - maybe one day she will find out why and be at peace with it :-4

lemon_and_mint · Post by **lemon_and_mint** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 2:57 pm

The other sad thing is that presumably, as my mother and her real brothers didnt have contact with them, her mother didnt have contact with her own children either, unless they did it in secret?

Kathy Ellen · Post by **Kathy Ellen** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 3:05 pm

That is very sad Lemon, and I'm sorry that your Mom did not get to meet her sister.

moonpie · Post by **moonpie** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 3:09 pm

Very sad news, but on the other hand, your mother will be very glad to at least known where she was, etc. Two years ago, I found a friend after being separated for 40 years, so there is something to at least hold in your heart. Condolences to all.

lemon_and_mint · Post by **lemon_and_mint** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 3:09 pm

its not all doom and gloom, the sister had a daughter and a grandaughter, and they are at least now planning to meet my sister, we dont know whether our mother will make any plans, considering what has happened.(my sister and i being cousins to these women).

Lisa · Post by **Lisa** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 3:52 pm

That's so sad for your Mom.

I think it would be a good idea if you could meet your cousins. You may be surprised how you may see a family resemblance.

lemon_and_mint · Post by **lemon_and_mint** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 3:55 pm

Lisa;751361 wrote: That's so sad for your Mom.

I think it would be a good idea if you could meet your cousins. You may be surprised how you may see a family resemblance.

oh definately, my sister and i are very curious to see what they are like and if there is a resemblance.

Lisa · Post by **Lisa** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 4:01 pm

lemon_and_mint;751365 wrote: oh definately, my sister and i are very curious to see what they are like and if there is a resemblance.

I hope things turn out well for you and your family!:)

Post by **Betty Boop** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 4:25 pm

Sorry to hear this Lemon, it's sad that your Mum didn't get to meet her sister. I hope your meeting goes well with your cousins though. :-4

mrsK · Post by **mrsK** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 6:28 pm

Love & hugs to you & your family L&M:-4:-4:-6

PurpleChicken · Post by **PurpleChicken** » Mon Dec 31, 2007 7:45 pm

Always sad to hear of someone passing, but moreso under circumstances such as these. I guess one day they will all meet up in heaven