REDGLITTER - she's GONE

[grh]

rjwould;770743 wrote: I think forum garden is less of a friendly place without Redglitter, and I hope what ever she does, she is happy with her decision.

She certainly is a big girl and can handle herself quite well.

I hope I have showed her how to not be embarrassed about coming back if she wants to.

On a side note; Some of the moderators here definitely need to be addressed. I find it reprehensible that moderators would start another forum, recruit members from here, and then permit bad mouthing of other members here or do it themselves. It is like a bunch teenage kids starting their own little fraternity or sorority for the purpose of getting their jollies backbiting people. You would think adults raising children would be past that by now, but then there are those with stunted or retarded growth....It's laughable...

I can imagine what some of the PM here look like...

Take care of yourself, what ever you do, Red..:-4


Why in the hell should she feel embarrassed about anything? And why in the world would you think she might?

She hasn't done some grand exit. She hasn't left in a huff. She's not throwing stuff and vowing vengeance. She hasn't posted for a few days, big whippeee~



What's laughable to me is that you or anyone else could have ever been bothered to know any of the crap you've just shared. Why in the hell does ANYONE care what ANYONE ELSE says about them ANYWHERE else? You need to look at growing up some yourself rj. I've managed to be here a very long time without feeling the need to check on what someone might be saying about me somewhere else. YOU need to get a grip, as does anyone that let's anyones view or opinion of you affect your own self esteem and or self worth. I say shame on YOU for giving it more value then it deserves!

Turn off the frickin PM system then you don't have to worry. I'm sure that some of you post stuff and then can just imagine what someone is now saying behind your back. Me, I could give a rats ass. Say it out loud or you are a worm unworthy of my concern, whatever you choose to say about me.

Say what you want about young Red. When she'd give me **** I could always count on her giving it to me to my face. Spooky sometimes, sure. Aggravating often, hell yeah... that just makes her like one of my own...:wah:

[YZGI]

Me and Red had a couple of disagreements, I never gave them a second thought. Why on earth would someone get upset over an internet discussion?:-5



In fact I tend to find it hilarious, but thats just me..

[twizzel]

Patsy Warnick;770549 wrote: Mission accomplished for those who bangered her.

I received a e-mail from Red - she will no longer be posting threads or comments.

Red will no longer be on FG.

I suppose she'd had enough and took enough from others here - so congratulations - you've run another person off..

I myself will miss her

Patsy Patsy ask Red to come back I ENJOYED HER POSTS Twizzel

[spot]

rjwould;770800 wrote: It's a conflict of interest....not to mention the fact that when one is granted moderator-ship, it is generally assumed they can stand above the fray, instead os just acting like it and abusing their power. That is not the case with these two particular moderators. Maturity is expected in being a moderator..I would encourage everyone who takes issue with any post by any moderator for any reason to report that post using the triangle icon supplied for that purpose in the post's bottom left hand corner. No report on any post ever disappears from the reporting system and the balance of opinion builds up quite conclusively over time.

I would, in fairness, point out that reported posts which don't give a reasoned description of the problem being reported tend to carry less weight. Be detailed, be descriptive, be methodical. Every little helps.

[grh]

rjwould;770800 wrote: She has nothing to be embarrassed of.....Thats my point...



It's a conflict of interest....not to mention the fact that when one is granted moderator-ship, it is generally assumed they can stand above the fray, instead os just acting like it and abusing their power. That is not the case with these two particular moderators. Maturity is expected in being a moderator..

I call Bullcrap on this one pal. But that's just because it's you and you're way too full of it for someone so new. I personally don't think we need any moderators. For sure I think we have ZERO business policing what the moderators do anywhere else. That, IMO takes big brother to the nth degree. I think you just get off on **** stirring.

I've not received one negative PM since joining this forum. I have however received many pleasant and encouraging PM's. I have no need to deactivate mine. What I said is, after reading some of the more hostile posts regrading others, I can imagine what is being said in private. Why would you even be curious, that's what I don't get... I barely care what you say when you post, I for sure don't care at all about things you're not posting in the open..

I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, grh, I spoke my mind....I hope that is ok with you..


Well, you have hurt my feelings rj. You've been trying to do just that since the moment you've shown up here, so I hope you're happy and will finally move your trolling on to harder, yet less amused folk...:-1

:p

[Mia]

Well I will miss her and hope she does return,she was always nice to me,and quite a prolific poster, even if controversial sometimes,that made her a more interesting person. I have never understood why people that disagree anothers opinions sometimes get nasty and personal. This has happened on every forum I have joined, not to me yet,but I think how sad when I see it done to others.

[Pheasy]

Jester;770823 wrote: Ive been a part of this forum now for several years, even when I wasn't 'here' posting daily I sitll viewed threads...

For all the contorversay, for all the fights, for all the clashes, for all the crazy he-said she-said stuff, this place is still the garden.

I can now step back and laugh at myself, and say so what. Iv'e had tiffs as far back as when I first got here... Ive gone toe to toe with Jives, Ladycop, Snooze, Koan and Spot and the latest was RJwould and a host of others on the sidelines of all of the issues... in the end its still just the internet...

What Ive learned is that Im not gonna change anyones opinion, its much easier to smile courteously and say 'Stick it in your ear'...

I disagreed regularly with Red. Somehow I was able to disagree and still give her a smile.

I disagree with a lot of you folks, but I respect them enough to engage them in discussion and keep it up, regardless of how frustrating it is in the heat of the moment.

I realize we go the distance some times. I say stick with it Red, in the process I learn a lot about life living through the folks here.

Take a break, then come back when your ready.


I wish I could view it as just the internet. :-5 I have many many good friends here, had loads laughs and shed a few tears :-5

Perhaps I should be one of those people who should stay away from forums :-5

[grh]

ThePheasant;770830 wrote: I wish I could view it as just the internet. :-5 I have many many good friends here, had loads laughs and shed a few tears :-5

Perhaps I should be one of those people who should stay away from forums :-5


Folks are only good friends so long as they don't judge you. That tends to last until the first time there is **** going on in your own life that you refuse to share with them to excuse behavior they didn't expect from you. Much easier to just decide you are not the person they thought you were at first and move on to someone who does perform up to their emotional standards.

That's just a rough guess on my part however... I don't pretend to have a clue and wouldn't presume to warn you or anyone to watch their back or their front or their emotions when dealing with any so-called friends you make on-line.

p.s. the worst ones are the ones who are the first to insist that they are not like that at all.:rolleyes:

[YZGI]

grh;770842 wrote: Folks are only good friends so long as they don't judge you. That tends to last until the first time there is **** going on in your own life that you refuse to share with them to excuse behavior they didn't expect from you. Much easier to just decide you are not the person they thought you were at first and move on to someone who does perform up to their emotional standards.



That's just a rough guess on my part however... I don't pretend to have a clue and wouldn't presume to warn you or anyone to watch their back or their front or their emotions when dealing with any so-called friends you make on-line.



p.s. the worst ones are the ones who are the first to insist that they are not like that at all.:rolleyes:

I'm not like this at all..

[Pheasy]

ThePheasant;770830 wrote: I wish I could view it as just the internet. :-5 I have many many good friends here, had loads laughs and shed a few tears :-5

Perhaps I should be one of those people who should stay away from forums :-5


What I meant was - I treat people here as I would treat people in RL - maybe that is not the right way to approach forums, I don't know

[spot]

Jester;770823 wrote: What Ive learned is that Im not gonna change anyones opinion, its much easier to smile courteously and say 'Stick it in your ear'...You're quite wrong there, my opinions have been changed more by talking to you than you might suspect. I'm grateful for the effort you've put into my education.

[Carolly]

ThePheasant;770851 wrote: What I meant was - I treat people here as I would treat people in RL - maybe that is not the right way to approach forums, I don't know Yer not alone there Pheasy be sure of that sweetheart;)

[spot]

rjwould;770853 wrote: Other than those who have been offended at the subjects I've raised, I've not harassed anyone or been as disrespectful as some have claimed. We are adult, aren't we? We don't need to be so suspicious or sensitive..Purely for the record, your subjects have been immaterial. Your thread-wrecking did on one occasion incense me. Your manner is entirely your own affair, if you want to be seen the way you present yourself that's your own business.

Regardless of how I or anyone else reacts to it though, the site needs posters like you and jj. We couldn't invent you, it'd be a different place without you. Whatever you do please don't leave, the remorse would leave me a trembling wreck.

[weeder]

rj A step in the right direction would be to stop referring to the women as BIG GIRLS. It probably isnt a good idea to diagnos grhs anger issues either. This person is VERY well educated, as you guessed, and can write circles around most internet hobbyists. Not that my opinion means anything. I dont belong to any cliques.

[WonderWendy3]

rjwould;770861 wrote: Pheasy, you are one of the most important people on this forum. Don't change a thing....


I agree with that....Pheasy is a sweet person and very sensitive....all of the different personailities of a forum is what makes it fun and interesting.

[Pheasy]

Ooops sorry everyone (thanks for the nice words), I threw this thread a little off track ( is there an 'all about me' thread I can go and hide in ) :-4

[weeder]

rjwould;770865 wrote: I would say big boy if I were speaking with a male..I am not diagnosing anyone, I am calling it as I see it.


That was a joke rj....... just bustin them. I thought you were a former New Yorker????? :wah:

[Bryn Mawr]

ThePheasant;770707 wrote: Hey you !! Give me my brain back :wah: Very well said Chez. :-4

It's not until you have been on the receiving end of a totally unjustified/unprovoked pm that you start to question a lot of things.

I for one have just about had enough of this sh*t! I joined FG to have fun and make friends.




If you get a PM like that then report it - maybe the first one will be taken as word against word but if enough reports go in then it will stick.

[Bryn Mawr]

Patsy Warnick;770549 wrote: Mission accomplished for those who bangered her.

I received a e-mail from Red - she will no longer be posting threads or comments.

Red will no longer be on FG.

I suppose she'd had enough and took enough from others here - so congratulations - you've run another person off..

I myself will miss her

Patsy


For the record, I thought the last person to be insulting and personal with Red was banned for his efforts.

Also for the record, I hope she reconsiders and starts posting again - she's a valued member of the Garden who adds a lot to the group.

[weeder]

rjwould;770877 wrote: I am, can't you tell I like fighting?:):)


You must be at least half Itallian then..... like me!! My other half is Irish. The booze mellows me out.

[Galbally]

spot;770593 wrote: If you representatives of one-time colonial outposts would just realize that England holds all your countries in equal affection then there might be less clamour for attention here and a degree more civility all round. And that goes for the Irish and Aussies just as much as for the Canadians and Americans, before anyone shouts favouritism. Some of my best friends live abroad.




Watch it with the civility Welsh boy, or I will clock you a cyber smack. :wah:

But back to the redG issue, I am just going through this thread now, for the record I hope she comes back. :-6

[jones jones]

"Where is the Love?"

Is this a silly question, am I being naïve

But where has the love gone

And when did it leave?

World filled with terror, filled with war

But where has the love gone

Will we see it no more?

[weeder]

rjwould;770905 wrote: No Italian at all, it's a mixture of English and Irish...But 99% of my childhood friends were Italian..They were crazy...


Thats right... how do you think they created The Sopranos?

LOng Island for me... then New York City for 18 years.....

Oops... I shouldnt do this here.

[weeder]

jones jones;770924 wrote: "Where is the Love?"

Is this a silly question, am I being naïve

But where has the love gone

And when did it leave?

World filled with terror, filled with war

But where has the love gone

Will we see it no more?


Nice... very nice... I hope this is for real. Your right.

[Galbally]

Also, just on the issue about people getting upset or fighting etc. I have been here on FG for a long time, (some of you may remember me) and I have seen a lot of fights and different things that have gone on. My own experience of FG is a very positive one, I have found the way its moderated to be fine, its policed as little as possible, but when it gets out of hand then the people who run the show step in. That is my honest experience, and I have only ever had one time where I felt someone had said something to be that I took serious offence to, most of the time I am able to take the negative things people may say (and its rare I would feel insulted here, but then I don't discuss much about my personal feelings or life outside of FG) with a pinch of salt.

What people have to remember, is that this is a public internet forum, its not a social club, or a support agency, a doctor's surgery, or any thing else. Anything you discuss here, is up for open debate by anyone who has joined FG. You have to take on board that many people are going to disagree with any opinion you have, and some people's style is to be abrasive, while others are more charming and sweet, some are in the middle, or both, but again, the vast majority of people you will encounter here are not your family, or your work colleagues, or your real life friends, so you should be wary of how much of your self and your emotions you put onto a public forum, which is mainly a place for debate and the exchange of views and ideas.

[valerie]

I think there's only a couple of people here who "tangled" more than

Red and I did. Today I am very proud to call her a good, true friend.

It's not a long friendship (yet) but I expect it will eventually be.

It started I believe in November 2006. Red and I had just had (I

don't want to do a lot of search, maybe only a couple weeks before)

a "tiff" in a thread and she said some things I thought were pretty bad.

I didn't report her post, however. She and I have talked about it a bit

and I think I didn't report it partially because I was feeling the futility

of reporting... but mainly because I thought there was something

valuable to look/wait for in her. I turned out to be right... I started a

thread about the death of our cat Gracie and Red posted in it. She

had no idea how I would take it but she had the cojones and the

understanding of what the loss might mean to try and console and support

at a time it was very much needed. And not too long after that, I extended

the olive branch and she graciously accepted it. I posted about it here,

to try and show people what can be done.



I've told her I'm sorry to not have her here. But I understand what it

is like even for a strong minded person to deal with the almost constant

bombardment. It wears you down, it really does. Some of you have

said you come here for fun, that's fine... but I come here for some fun

and some serious, I like a mix. What I don't like is having to see attacks

and there ain't sh*t you can do about it. Really awful things are left so

any future newbies (and you know this happens!!) can stumple across

it and think that is an acceptable way to talk to each other. It's quite

simply... NOT.



We are talking about a person who came here time after time and tried

her darndest to support this place. I did that a long time ago, trying

to pick interesting things and post them in places that didn't get a

lot of traffic. I flamed out very early on, though. It's just downright

annoying to have so many things that you think are intersting to

post about get picked apart. Who would want to continue with that?

Not me.



Reporting posts if the poster is a mod is a waste of time. My experience.

It's like doing this: :-5 So fuhgeddaboutit. Controversy "sells" so

it's what's left in. And I don't think enough mods are strong enough to

rein in the ones needing to be reined in. And reporting posts if you

get ANY reply at all (unlikely) sometimes just gets you the old "just

stay away from this user" crap. SUPER.



I think a lot of you who aren't attacked don't understand what it's like

to be in that position. I might not have gotten as much as some, but

I surely DO understand what it's like.



So, Red... lengthy though it is, that's what *I* have to say. And I

hope some day maybe we can meet in RL, and I'm glad I can "talk"

to you now, that losing you on the Garden doesn't mean losing you

REALLY.

[jones jones]

weeder;770928 wrote: Nice... very nice... I hope this is for real. Your right.


been waiting for the right place to post this ... it's a Jj original ...

bye red ...

[Galbally]

jones jones;770924 wrote: "Where is the Love?"

Is this a silly question, am I being naïve

But where has the love gone

And when did it leave?

World filled with terror, filled with war

But where has the love gone

Will we see it no more?




When did it end?

When did the age of peace and love start?

Cause I missed it!

[jones jones]

age of aquarius ... summer of '67 ... yasgirs farm ... woodstock ...

[cars]

Wow been gone a few days & look what happens!

Red, you will be sorely missed, your posts were informative, provocative, controversial, sensitive, & heartfelt.

Hopefully, after a brief respit Red, you will reconsider & return to the FG family fold! (We need you in it)



If you don't :

[AussiePam]

Galbers, it must have been peaceful for a little while in that first garden, then of course the snake trolled in and next you have people being driven out, murder mayhem etc.

I enjoy Forum Garden. It's a changing landscape, and addictive in its own way. A passing parade of soap opera. The opinions expressed in this forum are sometimes amazing to me as my own worldview is very different from a large proportion of them. One learns a degree of detachment. But, balanced with this, is the adventure, the possibility that today you will come across someone or some subject that sparks you, sets you on fire. I have good, long term, life friends who I first met on the internet.

I'll miss Red Glitter. I'm sorry she's been hurt. I think - in an open forum - most of us are going to get up someone else's nose at some point. But there's clashes and CLASHES. I guess it depends whose nose you get up and what kind of fingernails they insert to debooger themselves.

I miss all the colourful characters who no longer post here - Anastrophe, Snooze, LadyCop, my Italian friend Paola - those who wandered off with Far Rider, and subsequent migrations. Lots of coming and going. Second comings. Second goings. Door slams. etc etc. I guess this is the nature of the place. Anyway, one way or another, ForumGarden goes on.....

[Galbally]

jones jones;770948 wrote: age of aquarius ... summer of '67 ... yasgirs farm ... woodstock ...




Yeah, but what was it like without the drugs? I would say it was good fun though, I had to grow up in the 80s, god that was miserable, the music was nonsense, and the drug of choice was coke so everyone who was supposed to be cool was just spouting self important nonsense. Then all the dance knuckleheads discovered E's and that really was the end of civilization. I was in a nightclub a few months ago, it was like being on an alien planet full of styleless, graceless, witless people trying to avoid the really moronic violent 17 year old highly sexed and drugged up savages, with a soundtrack by the camp commandant of Dachau set at the volume of a crashing Boeing 747, and god help them, they actually think there are in a "scene", (though perhaps they are, but one painted by Hironomous Bosch) I mean jaysus, how did it end up like this?

[Galbally]

AussiePam;770970 wrote: Galbers, it must have been peaceful for a little while in that first garden, then of course the snake trolled in and next you have people being driven out, murder mayhem etc.

I enjoy Forum Garden. It's a changing landscape, and addictive in its own way. A passing parade of soap opera. The opinions expressed in this forum are sometimes amazing to me as my own worldview is very different from a large proportion of them. One learns a degree of detachment. But, balanced with this, is the adventure, the possibility that today you will come across someone or some subject that sparks you, sets you on fire. I have good, long term, life friends who I first met on the internet.

I'll miss Red Glitter. I'm sorry she's been hurt. I think - in an open forum - most of us are going to get up someone else's nose at some point. But there's clashes and CLASHES. I guess it depends whose nose you get up and what kind of fingernails they insert to debooger themselves.

I miss all the colourful characters who no longer post here - Anastrophe, Snooze, LadyCop, my Italian friend Paola - those who wandered off with Far Rider, and subsequent migrations. Lots of coming and going. Second comings. Second goings. Door slams. etc etc. I guess this is the nature of the place. Anyway, one way or another, ForumGarden goes on.....


I guess most internet forum's involving real people are all a bit like that really pammy.

[weeder]

jones jones;770948 wrote: age of aquarius ... summer of '67 ... yasgirs farm ... woodstock ...


Me Too..... Oh God, take me back... How DID we get here? and WHAT is this place????

[grh]

jones jones;770924 wrote: "Where is the Love?"

Is this a silly question, am I being naïve

But where has the love gone

And when did it leave?

World filled with terror, filled with war

But where has the love gone

Will we see it no more?


So, is this that 'nut is half full' guy?

[jones jones]

grh;770984 wrote: So, is this that 'nut is half full' guy?


huh?

[kazalala]

valerie;770931 wrote: I think there's only a couple of people here who "tangled" more than

Red and I did. Today I am very proud to call her a good, true friend.

It's not a long friendship (yet) but I expect it will eventually be.

It started I believe in November 2006. Red and I had just had (I

don't want to do a lot of search, maybe only a couple weeks before)

a "tiff" in a thread and she said some things I thought were pretty bad.

I didn't report her post, however. She and I have talked about it a bit

and I think I didn't report it partially because I was feeling the futility

of reporting... but mainly because I thought there was something

valuable to look/wait for in her. I turned out to be right... I started a

thread about the death of our cat Gracie and Red posted in it. She

had no idea how I would take it but she had the cojones and the

understanding of what the loss might mean to try and console and support

at a time it was very much needed. And not too long after that, I extended

the olive branch and she graciously accepted it. I posted about it here,

to try and show people what can be done.



I've told her I'm sorry to not have her here. But I understand what it

is like even for a strong minded person to deal with the almost constant

bombardment. It wears you down, it really does. Some of you have

said you come here for fun, that's fine... but I come here for some fun

and some serious, I like a mix. What I don't like is having to see attacks

and there ain't sh*t you can do about it. Really awful things are left so

any future newbies (and you know this happens!!) can stumple across

it and think that is an acceptable way to talk to each other. It's quite

simply... NOT.



We are talking about a person who came here time after time and tried

her darndest to support this place. I did that a long time ago, trying

to pick interesting things and post them in places that didn't get a

lot of traffic. I flamed out very early on, though. It's just downright

annoying to have so many things that you think are intersting to

post about get picked apart. Who would want to continue with that?

Not me.



Reporting posts if the poster is a mod is a waste of time. My experience.

It's like doing this: :-5 So fuhgeddaboutit. Controversy "sells" so

it's what's left in. And I don't think enough mods are strong enough to

rein in the ones needing to be reined in. And reporting posts if you

get ANY reply at all (unlikely) sometimes just gets you the old "just

stay away from this user" crap. SUPER.



I think a lot of you who aren't attacked don't understand what it's like

to be in that position. I might not have gotten as much as some, but

I surely DO understand what it's like.



So, Red... lengthy though it is, that's what *I* have to say. And I

hope some day maybe we can meet in RL, and I'm glad I can "talk"

to you now, that losing you on the Garden doesn't mean losing you

REALLY.


Best post on this thread:-4

I will miss Red too, we didnt talk a lot i wandered in to her threads sometimes and posted occasionally, we didnt get to know each other really well, i didnt agree with some of her views as no doubt she didnt agree with mine. But still i just liked her, she will be a miss. :-4

[koan]

grh;770677 wrote: I must be missing something here, because Red isn't gone from the members listing up top, so that means she's still here, hasn't left, etc.

I happen to think that a lot of Reds posts were borderline 'nuts' and some of them without so much of a visible borderline. But, and here's the big BUT, she thought the same thing about a lot of my posts and wasn't one bit afraid to say when she felt mine or other folks bent on things were tasteless, tacky, stupid and a host of other adjectives. That's why I liked arguing with her from time to time.

She does seem to get her shorts in a knot when she feels offended, yet is always quite happy to point out she doesn't mind offending others with her thoughts and observations

I predict RED is lurking and reading this thread faithfully. She will return once enough of her loyal subjects have begged her to reconsider...:rolleyes:


I thought this was the best post of the thread.

Of all the times to think RG has been run off, I haven't seen anything going on since her last tussle which, as mentioned earlier, resulted in the other member being banned.



Additionally, any other members using this thread to vent their own problems with moderators should consider starting their own thread about it instead of piggy-backing on the misfortune of another.

[Patsy Warnick]

Val

I too tangled up with RED - with understanding we've developed a good friendship. Exchanged C'mas gifts and keep in touch. I agree with you, after awhile the bagering - personal ugly comments - its not worth the trouble.

Red didn't remove her account - she didn't want alot of attention for leaving.

I don't know if she'd appreciate this thread ? Hopefully she'll peek in & read the warm heart felt feelings. Red was/is a valued member - worked hard to entertain us with a variety of threads.

I value our friendship.

Hopefully this absence is temporary

Koan

That individual is still a member here - he was here the other day - so he wasn't banned..

Patsy

[koan]

Patsy Warnick;771043 wrote:

Koan

That individual is still a member here - he was here the other day - so he wasn't banned..

Patsy


Infractions expire.

Am I to believe that RedGlitter is leaving unless we permanently ban another member? That's not very admirable if that's the case. Ultimatums aren't usually received well.

[el guapo]

koan;771047 wrote: Infractions expire.

Am I to believe that RedGlitter is leaving unless we permanently ban another member? That's not very admirable if that's the case. Ultimatums aren't usually received well.


so the other person was suspended not banned

[koan]

el guapo;771048 wrote: so the other person was suspended not banned


The word "banned" appeared below his username...

[Patsy Warnick]

Koan

I never mentioned anything close to a Ultimatum

You stated he was banned

Now your stating a Infraction expired, so he's not banned

I had no idea that one is just put into "time out".

Patsy

[Sheryl]

RedGlitter;766914 wrote: Good grief.Like your attention-seeking "Would You Miss me If I Left The Garden" thread isn't? Or is that a snide jab directed at him?


Ironic??

[koan]

Patsy Warnick;771055 wrote: Koan

I never mentioned anything close to a Ultimatum

You stated he was banned

Now your stating a Infraction expired, so he's not banned

I had no idea that one is just put into "time out".

Patsy


I'm just, plain stating that he was banned. Bans end when infractions expire. It takes three unexpired infractions to be banned. For those that don't know how it works... there it is.

The only thing that has happened recently involving RedGlitter is that JD's ban ended. Now you say she's leaving and the only real connection made is that the banned member is back. That sounds like an ultimatum to me.