What If!!!!!!!!!

jasmund · Post by **jasmund** » Thu Jun 30, 2005 10:52 pm

If you could go back in time and change one thing in your life what would it be, and why?

Please be serious with your response, I will go first, If I could go back through my entire life and change the course of one single event, it would be that my ex-husband did not have npd,

Then we would still be a family

polycarp · Post by **polycarp** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 5:31 am

If I could go back in time, I'd have told my late friend Godfrey (who died in a car crash in 2000) not to take that trip. In my life, I would have read harder to avoid the extra year I spent in school.

jasmund · Post by **jasmund** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 5:53 am

Diane- NPD is narcissitic personality disorder learn moren under Sam Vanknin Malignant Self Love.

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 6:32 am

I would have gone to college instead of getting married a month after graduation.

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 7:51 am

The day I met **** ****** I would turn the other way and RUN.

weeder · Post by **weeder** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 8:55 am

jasmund wrote: Diane- NPD is narcissitic personality disorder learn moren under Sam Vanknin Malignant Self Love.
My lasy relationship was with a man suffering from NPD. We broke up almost 5 years ago. My self esteem is just about back to normal now. And yet I was going to answere the What would you change? question by saying.... I wish I could have made that relationship work. Despite the illness which I didnt really identify until it was over.. I still miss all of the things we had in common... and the loss of plans we had made for our future together. Being subjected to someone with NPD is one of the hardest experiences to recover from. It is very subliminal, confusing. painful, and destructive. Not as simple as a black eye, or bruises. So I guess I would go all the way back to the beginning. For me 1970. Upon graduating high school, I would have gone on to college and left the man thing on the back burner until I was at least 30.

buttercup · Post by **buttercup** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 9:58 am

i wouldent change a thing because if i did i wouldent be who i am now

no wize cracks about pigs at troughs fg members

buttercup · Post by **buttercup** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 10:56 am

in a position of authority hun you make the decision you do based on what you feel is right at the time, are you accountable for it, hell yeah

do you beat yourself up about it, no

you would not be in that position if you were not respected for your decision making abilities by your peers

Lon · Post by **Lon** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 2:05 pm

jasmund wrote: If you could go back in time and change one thing in your life what would it be, and why?

Please be serious with your response, I will go first, If I could go back through my entire life and change the course of one single event, it would be that my ex-husband did not have npd,

Then we would still be a family
I really like my life today and who I am. I'm afraid that if I was able to go back and make changes in my life, it would disrupt eveything and things now would not be as they are.

cars · Post by **cars** » Fri Jul 01, 2005 2:32 pm

If I could go back in time I would go back to April 24, 1997 and change one of my LOTTO ticket numbers to a stinkin 10 instead of 25, & I would have won $3.5 million dollars. :-5

That sure would have changed my life big time!!! I did however win $2,411 dollars, but that's a far cry from $3.5 mil. :-2

Nuthrday · Post by **Nuthrday** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 4:39 pm

I would have totally quit being fixated on my weight! I would have had SO much more fun that way! I never knew some guys like chubby chicks! How come nobody ever told me???

Nuthrday · Post by **Nuthrday** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 6:50 pm

Damn straight, Flopstock!! But it kills me that I didn't find that out til I was 51....What kind of cake, Chicklet?? (I've been bad all week!) (Somebody give me some incentive to get back on the weight-loss trail in the morning.)

And, yeah, I'm a mom. I am so friggin' smart you wouldn't bleeeve it!

Nuthrday · Post by **Nuthrday** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 7:32 pm

YUM on the cake!! Darn you!

My daughter thinks I'm really smart now. And she is so proud that her friends think I'm cool. Wow, who'd a thunk? But I have smart kids!

devist8me · Post by **devist8me** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 7:47 pm

If I could change one thing, it would be to start having kids way earlier. If I'd known I was going to love being a mother, I would of had my own ball team by now instead of just now having the first.

mominiowa · Post by **mominiowa** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 8:48 pm

If I could change anything - it would be trying to make my first marriage work even harder then I did..I am not sure what led up to his drinking and abuse but he wasn't that person when I met him..I would have the family I need right now..not saying my husband isn't a great step-dad- just when I know time is limited as a family - it would be easier to have their dad right here -understanding every emotion we are all going through..Did that make sense?:-3

But then again I have another one----As we turned off the machine, and my dad laid there watching us - instead of saying "It's ok - dad..you can go now" I would have said - :yh_sigh "Fight harder dad - I can not live with out you!!!!"- Yes selfish as it may seem....but I sure miss my daddy...:yh_brokeh

Nuthrday · Post by **Nuthrday** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 10:39 pm

Far Rider, isn't the 'net great for admitting things??? If you're in the right mood, that is!

theia · Post by **theia** » Mon Jul 04, 2005 10:49 pm

I would really "live" each day instead of worrying about the next.

And what was it you said about that first cigarette, flop?

minks · Post by **minks** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 11:16 am

jasmund wrote: If you could go back in time and change one thing in your life what would it be, and why?

Please be serious with your response, I will go first, If I could go back through my entire life and change the course of one single event, it would be that my ex-husband did not have npd,

Then we would still be a family

I would have kicked, slapped, screamed, pulled hair and had a right royal temper tantrum at the ex, then gone to my parents for money to fly 2 provinces away to attend my life best friend's funeral. To date I still really really dispise the ex for not allowing me to go back then. I still have a very raw spot on my heart and closure remains un-done. (one day I will get to her grave site)

Jives · Post by **Jives** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 1:26 pm

I'd go back in time and stop my best life-long friend Elmer, from mouthing off to the police and getting beaten to death.

(And no offense to the police Ladycop, the policeman who did it was insane and later that month shot his wife to death and killed himself.)

hotsauce · Post by **hotsauce** » Tue Jul 05, 2005 2:45 pm

Jives wrote: I'd go back in time and stop my best life-long friend Elmer, from mouthing off to the police and getting beaten to death.

(And no offense to the police Ladycop, the policeman who did it was insane and later that month shot his wife to death and killed himself.)
oh my gosh! that is terrible!

i would go back and visit my grandma a whole lot more...regret is a terrible thing to carry around.

jasmund · Post by **jasmund** » Wed Jul 06, 2005 4:53 pm

-Same here, you may never be able to totally get over the pain, but it will turn from raw to blunt. Lesson learned, and when its all over we are reminded of what special people WE are, and that THEY SCREWED UP!!!!!!

You are the same special person that you were when you met your N now your even wiser and have knowledge of what to avoid.

Hang in there

remember a bad day is only 24 hours long, happiness is forever

cars · Post by **cars** » Wed Jul 06, 2005 5:44 pm

hotsauce wrote: oh my gosh! that is terrible!

i would go back and visit my grandma a whole lot more...regret is a terrible thing to carry around.

Wow Hot where you bin? Missed your posts.

jasmund · Post by **jasmund** » Thu Jul 07, 2005 6:18 pm

Cars -

I know what you mean my grandma died 10 years ago and I can still hear her voice when I close my eyes, thats a sweet gift to have all these years.

She beleived in me

-jasmund

cars · Post by **cars** » Fri Jul 08, 2005 7:00 am

jasmund wrote: Cars -

I know what you mean my grandma died 10 years ago and I can still hear her voice when I close my eyes, thats a sweet gift to have all these years.

She beleived in me

-jasmund

jas- I don't think you were referring to one of my posts, buy anyway you are extremely fortunate to be able to have such a sweet gift, one that so many of us are longing for. May her voice always be there for you!

Cars

Clint · Post by **Clint** » Fri Jul 08, 2005 9:47 am

I would move to the place where I started school and I would never have moved from there. IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ve moved too many times. I donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t have any life long friends. I envy people who are deeply rooted and connected to the community they live in. At least I taught my children right and theyÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ve both been in the same place for more than 20 years now.

I donÃ¢â‚¬â„¢t regret all the wonderful people IÃ¢â‚¬â„¢ve come to know along the way.

nvalleyvee · Post by **nvalleyvee** » Fri Jul 08, 2005 5:15 pm

My oldest and dearest friend - Godfather to my daughter - was killed by a drunk driver. I'd tell him to leave the restaurant a few minutes earlier or later. We miss him very much. The person who killed him happened to be one of his HS students. Her punishment was to hang his picture in her bedroom until she was 18. This totally upset my daughter. I got a call from her school to come and get her after a DARE assembly that featured his death and this girl. It seems she stood up and screamed at the girl that she murdered her Godfather and hanging his picture was a no good punishment for taking his life.