Schools Handing Out Condoms

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 7:03 am

How do you feel about schools handing out condoms? Should they? Why or why not?

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 7:46 am

the day i packed my son for college i included several packages of expensive spermicidal condoms in his luggage, because i love him. and i am a realist/pragmatist. that was my personal decision. however, i would not have liked it had the school pre-empted my influence, however well-intentioned.

Peg · Post by **Peg** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 7:58 am

lady cop wrote: the day i packed my son for college i included several packages of expensive spermicidal condoms in his luggage, because i love him. and i am a realist/pragmatist. that was my personal decision. however, i would not have liked it had the school pre-empted my influence, however well-intentioned.

Not every child is as lucky. I wouldn't have a problem with our schools handing out condoms. There's too many diseases and babies having babies out there. While I discourage my children to have sex, I think they know if they are going to anyways, they can come to me and I will do whatever it takes for them to practice safe sex. BUT there is undoubtedly parents who wouldn't and I'd rather see these kids as safe as possible.

beautyful · Post by **beautyful** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 8:00 am

Peg wrote: Not every child is as lucky. I wouldn't have a problem with our schools handing out condoms. There's too many diseases and babies having babies out there. While I discourage my children to have sex, I think they know if they are going to anyways, they can come to me and I will do whatever it takes for them to practice safe sex. BUT there is undoubtedly parents who wouldn't and I'd rather see these kids as safe as possible.

I think I'd have to agree with you there, surely its better to prepare children rather than just try to discourage them from something they are gonna do anyway. at least they are gonna be safer this way

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 8:49 am

lady cop wrote: the day i packed my son for college i included several packages of expensive spermicidal condoms in his luggage, because i love him. and i am a realist/pragmatist. that was my personal decision. however, i would not have liked it had the school pre-empted my influence, however well-intentioned.
I know its going a little off the subject but i wondered, would you have done the same for a daughter??

beautyful · Post by **beautyful** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 8:55 am

abbey wrote: I know its going a little off the subject but i wondered, would you have done the same for a daughter??

thats a good point abbey, whenever it comes to something like this, men are often treated differently to women. women need this sort of preparation as much as men, why shouldn't they be treated equally?

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 9:10 am

What's the alternative? I know if i had a child i'd much rather he/she were encouraged to use contraception than have a daughter go along to a dr for an abortion alone & scared at the age of 13.

When i was a younger i never had the sort of relationship with my mum where i could discuss such things, surely like me, not every family has that openness where you can approach your parents for advice on contraception.

A Karenina · Post by **A Karenina** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 11:54 am

Daughters can be given condoms, too.

I think students should be able to get condoms even from their school because of the safe sex issue. We're not helping anybody by pretending that all of our kids are saving themselves for marriage.

persephone · Post by **persephone** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 3:59 pm

They have actually taken the idea of installing condom machines in school toilets here many a time with the parent board thingies, each time it has been turned down on account that the parents feel it would be encouraging under age sex.

I always think this is parents with their heads stuck in the sand, it's promoting safe sex in under age children, we need to promote that far more, if you look at the teenage pregnancy rate over here. They don't need any encouragement to have sex, it's already happening.

Paula · Post by **Paula** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 4:36 pm

I don't think it is good? Handing out condoms i feel would promote sex and encourage it? This is difficult...i have sons, they seemed to know where to get them? (What Grade?) & where is the line drawn? We have too much sex in society, so many sexual differences, anything goes, anywhere & anyone????

just like giving the drug users (clean) needles, not sure... :-3

capt_buzzard · Post by **capt_buzzard** » Sun Nov 28, 2004 5:25 pm

They do this in Ireland already for the over 15s.

Bothwell · Post by **Bothwell** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 2:14 am

Giving out condoms is NOT going to encourage sex, it may prevent unwanted pregnancies which is a very very good thing. Once a teenager gets in his/her mind to have sex they will, why not help them to have sex safely, the protection they afford over sexually transmitted disease (rising in the UK) is also very important.

Bill Sikes · Post by **Bill Sikes** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 5:46 am

Peg wrote: How do you feel about schools handing out condoms? Should they? Why or why not?

Depends what you mean by "schools". In the UK, the "age of consent" is 16.

Below that sex is not allowed. I think that a gould start would be to enforce

this limit rigidly and even-handedly, rather than the slack "it doesn't matter".

lady cop · Post by **lady cop** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 6:20 am

abbey wrote: I know its going a little off the subject but i wondered, would you have done the same for a daughter??
absolutely. however i raised three sons. and in such a way that no question was off-limits or embarrassing. we talked about everything from emerging hair to night-time emmisions. i provided a safe place for frank discussion and non-judgemental honest response. never acted shocked even if i was. and even now my adult sons trust what i say. who else should have taught them but me? they are each good men thankfully. they can tell me anything.... LOL but i will say they did not always appreciate having a cop for a mom, it did dampen their style! they could not get away with anything!

A Karenina · Post by **A Karenina** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 9:11 am

Bill Sikes wrote: Depends what you mean by "schools". In the UK, the "age of consent" is 16.

Below that sex is not allowed. I think that a gould start would be to enforce

this limit rigidly and even-handedly, rather than the slack "it doesn't matter".

How would you enforce it? Would you imprison teens who have sex younger than age 16? Would you fine them? Just curious ~

beautyful · Post by **beautyful** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 9:20 am

The thing is nothing is going to stop teenagers having sex, the important thing is that they are prepared for all that sex entails and that they are safe.

Paula · Post by **Paula** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 9:22 am

Smoking Patches should be distributed also, too many young people are smoking, stop them young!!!There is a Birth Control Patch too! No-one talked about a rubber when i went to high school? Everything was so different in my time, although a-lot of pot smoking was going on. Control pills were available...you could buy skins too!!! Ya, the young people need protection.. :driving: :driving:

Bill Sikes · Post by **Bill Sikes** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 9:27 am

A Karenina wrote: How would you enforce it? Would you imprison teens who have sex younger than age 16? Would you fine them? Just curious ~

How is the law normally applied? It's like any other - break the law, and pay

some sort of penalty. If that isn't acceptable, change the law, don't just apply

it selectively. Reduce the aage of consent to 12. OK?

persephone · Post by **persephone** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 11:05 am

Having known a good few under age persons who have been caught it all seems a very silly process... Parents (normally of the girl) discover she has had sex with her boyfriend, both are under 16. Parents of girl call police and have to press charges etc. etc.

The boy is charged and gets a caution. The girls gets nothing.

Now thinking about this although a caution is short lived and I think maybe even wiped when they turn either 16 or 18, what good does that do them, some are leaving school at this age and appling for training courses, the caution shows up on their records.

Then of course there's the whole thing that it wasn't just the boy who had under age sex, so why is it only him who has to pay, it takes two and all that.

Depends what you mean by "schools". In the UK, the "age of consent" is 16.

Below that sex is not allowed. I think that a gould start would be to enforce

this limit rigidly and even-handedly, rather than the slack "it doesn't matter"And Bill, you really think that by not giving under 16's condoms we're going to stop them from having sex?

When you walk down the street and see young mums pushing buggies do you really think they are 16+, or never had sex before, or even that the baby is really their older sisters?

Like Bothwell said condoms also prevent STD's, so many young people have them without even knowing until it's too late.

Bill Sikes · Post by **Bill Sikes** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 11:16 am

letha wrote: Having known a good few under age persons who have been caught it all seems a very silly process... Parents (normally of the girl) discover she has had sex with her boyfriend, both are under 16. Parents of girl call police and have to press charges etc. etc.

The boy is charged and gets a caution. The girls gets nothing.

Equality in action....

letha wrote: Now thinking about this although a caution is short lived and I think maybe even wiped when they turn either 16 or 18, what good does that do them, some are leaving school at this age and appling for training courses, the caution shows up on their records.

Then of course there's the whole thing that it wasn't just the boy who had under age sex, so why is it only him who has to pay, it takes two and all that.

What if she's 14 and he's 17, or 18, or 19, 22, 30 years old?

letha wrote: And Bill, you really think that by not giving under 16's condoms we're going to stop them from having sex?

Erm, no - and I don't think I said that. If they can be dissuaded from having sex

at all it might help.... unfortunately, I think that pressure to do so is ingrained

in the way of life. Look at TV, magazines, resulting ideas and peer pressure...

persephone · Post by **persephone** » Mon Nov 29, 2004 11:50 am

What if she's 14 and he's 17, or 18, or 19, 22, 30 years old?Well that's different, she hasn't had sex with someone under age, and the law and society see it as the male has taken advantage of a child, although I do not always agree with that, as some teenagers are far beyond their years (note I said some not all).

I was talking about if the boy is also under 16, why does the girl get away with having sex with an under age boy.

Actually just popped into my mind, a child under the age of 16 can consent to medical treatment without the parents consent, so long as the child is able to fully understand the implications of the treatment... Again the reference to this has gone from my head, but it's a case of parents v NHS trust around Peterborough area.

So if we decide this in medicine then surely the same goes for sex providing both are consenting and understand the implications of the act.

You forgot hormonal pressure and plain old fashioned curiosity.

Under age sex is nothing new, for years I believed that older generations had saved themselves until their wedding day, only to find out that a lot hadn't, just think of the WW years. "Lay back and think of England", they really did!