Lost a friend.
Lost a friend.
You may have to let it go, and that is so sad. I would be furious at my mother in law. Its sort of like your in a feud, since family feelings are involved. Before you do though, give it one more try, Maybe a long letter explaining everything would be better than a phone call. Good luck.
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Lost a friend.
I have had a lifetime of ignorant, trouble making mother in laws. As an older woman.... Im telling you.. mother in laws may come and go... a lifelong friend is worth millions of dollars. I have always felt that forcing someone to choose between loved ones, is one of the cruelest things a person can do to someone.
That is one of the reasons why I could never be in a serious relationship again. I would never tolerate being forced to choose.
That is one of the reasons why I could never be in a serious relationship again. I would never tolerate being forced to choose.
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Lost a friend.
Never trust third-party observations.
Lost a friend.
sorry to read that AE,i to had a very good freind who moved away and just stopped tslking to me for what ever reason.I had not spoke to her for 10 years and last sat we met up for the first time through a mutal freind.I hope things wil getted sorted for you.
Greer is the one with short hair right hand side and the other women is my best freind Elaine
Greer is the one with short hair right hand side and the other women is my best freind Elaine
The rottie queen
Lost a friend.
I lost one of my good friend, i wish he comes back to me again!
Lost a friend.
darwin;668335 wrote: I lost one of my good friend, i wish he comes back to me again!
oh Darwin i really feel for you,:-4
oh Darwin i really feel for you,:-4
The rottie queen
Lost a friend.
AngelEye82, oh, I am so sad suddenly.
it is a bad way for loosing friends - and a true one , probably.
Human relations and Human bondage - are very gentle values, more breakable than the thinnest glass. I've studied "getting and accumulating friends and buddies" in a special school for grownups - like the Dale Carnegy foundation schools over the world. had also practiced the methods. Worked more than a decade - having to convince customs officials to lesser taxes... and they are the worst kind of people - any where.
I am sure your friend might, just might feel the same kind of regret , about losing a friend like you. the best way to overcome her fences, by lowering them, before you call or meet - is to call at least 2 of your mutual friends from those days - and tell them the true reasons why you are so sorry that you became estranged. blame it on the mother-in laws. make sure - they will do you the service of enlightening her. tell and call to ask them and renew the connections. then, after some days - call your friend at a time she is home- and apologies personally. ask for her forgiveness.
even the hardest hearted people - feel elated when someone asks them to forgive some mistake. We Jews have a saying that where a repented person stands before god - no other saint-man can stand...
it is a bad way for loosing friends - and a true one , probably.
Human relations and Human bondage - are very gentle values, more breakable than the thinnest glass. I've studied "getting and accumulating friends and buddies" in a special school for grownups - like the Dale Carnegy foundation schools over the world. had also practiced the methods. Worked more than a decade - having to convince customs officials to lesser taxes... and they are the worst kind of people - any where.
I am sure your friend might, just might feel the same kind of regret , about losing a friend like you. the best way to overcome her fences, by lowering them, before you call or meet - is to call at least 2 of your mutual friends from those days - and tell them the true reasons why you are so sorry that you became estranged. blame it on the mother-in laws. make sure - they will do you the service of enlightening her. tell and call to ask them and renew the connections. then, after some days - call your friend at a time she is home- and apologies personally. ask for her forgiveness.
even the hardest hearted people - feel elated when someone asks them to forgive some mistake. We Jews have a saying that where a repented person stands before god - no other saint-man can stand...
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RedGlitter
- Posts: 15777
- Joined: Thu Dec 22, 2005 3:51 am
Lost a friend.
That's a smart post, Donut. Very smart indeed.
Susie, how's that going for you anyway?
Susie, how's that going for you anyway?
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Tater Tazz
- Posts: 2938
- Joined: Tue Oct 03, 2006 9:25 am
Lost a friend.
You could just let it go, or, you could just keep sending emails or what ever. Maybe, she will come around, if not you still have friends here.
Lost a friend.
I have known my best friend for just about 20 years. I actually dated her husband before she did! (but only very briefly).
Anyway, she and I have had our ups and downs. I have said and done some horrid things, and she's done some not-so-nice things herself. We went for a period of about 5 years without speaking.
My point is this: Give her time and space. She is obviously still quite hurt and angry. I sincerely hope she is able to get passed it, and rekindle your friendship. I'm sure part of her misses you as much as you miss her.
I would avoid overwhelming her with attempts to contact. That could aggravate things, and maybe even make her more angry.
If I were you, I would write her a letter. I would tell her that you were lied to about the dirty looks thing, I would acknowledge the hurtful things you said, and apologize as sincerely as you can. I would end the letter by telling her how much you love and miss her, and how much you hope to earn her trust and friendship back, but also let her know that you understand her hurt and anger. Let her know that you'll be waiting to hear from her, and that you won't try to push or rush her.
After that, all you can do move on. Put the ball in her court. But you will be able to rest a bit more easily by knowing you have done everything in your power to mend the fence. It might take a year (or five!) but if the friendship is strong and true, it will come back.
Best of luck to you!
Anyway, she and I have had our ups and downs. I have said and done some horrid things, and she's done some not-so-nice things herself. We went for a period of about 5 years without speaking.
My point is this: Give her time and space. She is obviously still quite hurt and angry. I sincerely hope she is able to get passed it, and rekindle your friendship. I'm sure part of her misses you as much as you miss her.
I would avoid overwhelming her with attempts to contact. That could aggravate things, and maybe even make her more angry.
If I were you, I would write her a letter. I would tell her that you were lied to about the dirty looks thing, I would acknowledge the hurtful things you said, and apologize as sincerely as you can. I would end the letter by telling her how much you love and miss her, and how much you hope to earn her trust and friendship back, but also let her know that you understand her hurt and anger. Let her know that you'll be waiting to hear from her, and that you won't try to push or rush her.
After that, all you can do move on. Put the ball in her court. But you will be able to rest a bit more easily by knowing you have done everything in your power to mend the fence. It might take a year (or five!) but if the friendship is strong and true, it will come back.
Best of luck to you!