Better or worse to belong?.

abbey · Post by **abbey** » Sun Feb 13, 2005 8:32 am

Florrie wrote: February flowers everywhere, love :-4 is in the air....on the billboards, the adverts, the TV, the shops.

But is it better to be single and lonely (family or lover) than be attached and discontent?

I'd much rather be alone than in a relationship and lonely.

BabyRider · Post by **BabyRider** » Sun Feb 13, 2005 10:40 am

WAY better to be alone than with someone who doesn't make you happy. Why live a lie?

Lon · Post by **Lon** » Sun Feb 13, 2005 10:58 am

Florrie wrote: February flowers everywhere, love :-4 is in the air....on the billboards, the adverts, the TV, the shops.

But is it better to be single and lonely (family or lover) than be attached and discontent?
You make it sound like those are the only choices. How about attached and happy, or single and happy. We are responsible for how we feel, not others.

Beth · Post by **Beth** » Sun Feb 13, 2005 11:05 am

Dunno. Sometimes I think I would like to just be single and buy my own freaking flowers and box of chocolates.

A Karenina · Post by **A Karenina** » Sun Feb 13, 2005 11:19 am

Florrie wrote: But is it better to be single and lonely (family or lover) than be attached and discontent?
I'm single, but I'm not lonely. Sure, every so often loneliness visits, but I think it visits everyone, not just single people. Maybe even loneliness gets lonely? LOL

Truth is, whether I am in a relationship or not, I'd rather feel peaceful inside myself, knowing that I haven't settled, that I will wait for the right person. But it's not passive waiting, either. I have so many things I'd like to improve about myself, my life, my relationships with family and friends, and that's what I intend to concentrate on.

That is a lesson learned from my last relationship, recently ended. Don't settle for the next guy. Don't overlook huge differences between us just because there are some similarities.

I will buy myself flowers - I have my eye on some African Violets that just arrived at the plant store and would look pretty in my kitchen window. Mostly, I'm not gonna sweat it. Loving myself, loving my friends, loving my job - these are all worth celebrating.

Post by **kensloft** » Sun Feb 13, 2005 7:45 pm

Florrie wrote: February flowers everywhere, love :-4 is in the air....on the billboards, the adverts, the TV, the shops.

But is it better to be single and lonely (family or lover) than be attached and discontent?

Depends on what you are in need of getting.

minks · Post by **minks** » Mon Feb 14, 2005 12:44 pm

Beth wrote: Dunno. Sometimes I think I would like to just be single and buy my own freaking flowers and box of chocolates.

Heh Heh

Card would say

"To: Me

From: Me

Love Me"

I like it hehehe

Well I would have to say it would be best to make the choice that makes "me" happiest.

Alone and Happy is nice, and Matched and Happy is nicer. So do what makes you happiest.

Beth · Post by **Beth** » Mon Feb 14, 2005 4:40 pm

minks wrote: Heh Heh

Card would say

"To: Me

From: Me

Love Me"

I like it hehehe

Well I would have to say it would be best to make the choice that makes "me" happiest.

Alone and Happy is nice, and Matched and Happy is nicer. So do what makes you happiest.Hehe. Imagine plucking the petals, "I love me, ...I love me not, ...I love me, ...I love me not,..." The card was funny. I think I would just plop a chocolate in my mouth in an act of self-love while snuggling up to a Colin Firth movie.

minks · Post by **minks** » Mon Feb 14, 2005 4:44 pm

Beth wrote: Hehe. Imagine plucking the petals, "I love me, ...I love me not, ...I love me, ...I love me not,..." The card was funny. I think I would just plop a chocolate in my mouth in an act of self-love while snuggling up to a Colin Firth movie.

Ahahahahaha that is funny the flower thing and yes your solution may be the best least you know your doing yourself a favor ahahahaha

"it's all about me damn it me me me me for me" :wah:

Post by **kensloft** » Mon Feb 14, 2005 4:56 pm

Florrie wrote: The observasion and question was raised by 17 year old last week.

Has been in a C. Home since age 2, now contemplating options for independent living.

Reckoned that whether it's family or lover, friend or foe, relationships that are good, bad, happy or sad, are changable values, and it's 'Belonging' that is fixed and important.
Wow! Smart young person!!!

Post by **kensloft** » Mon Feb 14, 2005 5:01 pm

minks wrote: Ahahahahaha that is funny the flower thing and yes your solution may be the best least you know your doing yourself a favor ahahahaha

"it's all about me damn it me me me me for me" :wah:

She loves me? She loves me not? Hmmm? Methinks you are on to something! It's not about them at all. Now that that has been figured out there are millions of flowers that are going to set up a niche for you saving their lives.

Way to go minks.

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Wed Mar 02, 2005 5:20 pm

The is a difference between being "alone" and being "lonely". You can be alone and be very content and be lonely in a relationship. If you can be content when alone at times, and be content with other people at times---you got it made. Being lonely in relationship for an extended period of time usually results in the ending of such relationship. Been there.

I now have it both ways--I enjoy being by myself sometimes and most of the time I enjoy being with my guy. He does not make me feel lonely at all.