an awful thing

Discussion group for bereaved people.This forum offers support, understanding, compassion and hope to bereaved people, struggling to rebuild their lives after the death of their loved ones.
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Joined: Tue Jan 01, 2008 6:26 am

an awful thing

Post by changinglanes »

I have not been posting because my cousin hacked my pc and was sending links to here to read of he could even prove it was me. I have been absent and my pc redone and now have a constant security so it won't happen again.

I felt as violated as someone breaking into my home and we have enough evidence to prosecute which I have already put in motion.

I have not had nothing to do with them (other than dad) for almost 2 mos. I just want to be left alone but it seems to fuel the fire. This has helped me get on my feet and use the legal system and think in a more clear headed mind. I am so pissed off. I know had I been near enough I'd be in jail. Right now this is my only link to the outside. We changed phone #s got P.O. Boxes and even my kids living alone did the same thing. I dont care what they read here because I have been forthright and honest.

To hack into my pc and read my mail and my personal writings (like a journal) really outraged me. I found out when I my pc said I could not delete something and there was a small note under it it said *you can't hide we see and read everything you have*

No PC replies that way. Plus my emails I had inbox I had read already were all changed word for word.

Should have seen you what your's said Red.

Luckily I had orginal stored on here.

It is unbelievable who pathetic and the lenghths people will stoop. This person has no life and has well proven that.

I am so angry. Picking on a person who is recovering from just a great loss has to be the lowest level one can stoop.
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an awful thing

Post by Rapunzel »

I really feel for you CL. I had my pc hacked by someone several years ago because they knew my password. They then sent me a trojan horse which completely fried my computer and I had to spend £600 on a new one, as nothing was salvagable. I was livid, but also naive. Luckily someone else told me that if they know your password then your computer is an open book to them. Change all your passwords, as I did, to something they can't guess. No family names, pets names, birthdays, etc.

Good luck to you. From experience I will also say that some people hate others to be happier than themselves and will try to bring them down to their own level of misery. Your family seem to take pleasure in hurting you. If you look back you will probably find there has always been some hidden nastiness that you didn't pay much attention to, maybe thinking you misunderstood their motives. If thats so then all you can do is cut them out of your life. Although its extremely painful now, the pain will eventually fade and they won't be able to hurt you again. The longer you allow them to hurt you then the longer they will hurt you. Your pain gives them pleasure and makes them feel strong. You have to lose them to save yourself. :yh_hugs
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an awful thing

Post by Chezzie »

wow, their really vindictive huh!

Like you said, you have enough on your plate still grieving for your mum, without some a$$wipes making your life unbearable.

Good job you sound like a level and headstronged person who wont allow these idiots to get inside your head and mess with it.

You have your hubby and kids, and forum garden, let it all out and dont let the losers win.

Take Care hun x:-6
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Joined: Tue Nov 16, 2004 1:00 pm

an awful thing

Post by abbey »

I presume you've changed your pin number?

If he has your username and account number then he can log on from anywhere.

Maybe it would be best to delete this account and set up a new one under a different username.
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Joined: Wed Jan 03, 2007 2:41 pm

an awful thing

Post by hoxtonchris »

rapunzel is right,i have had to cut very close family from my life for similar reasons,its gutwrenching buti know if i just hang on and dont give in to their emotional blackmail my life will be much the richer,,good luck and be good to yourself
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Joined: Wed Nov 07, 2007 12:28 pm

an awful thing

Post by moonpie »

What a terrible thing. Hard to believe how people will stoop so low when they have an axe to grind. Hang in there, and keep going with legal action, hopefully you will have the last word on this matter. Good luck.:)
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Joined: Tue Jan 01, 2008 6:26 am

an awful thing

Post by changinglanes »

I am feeling better and have made a lot of security changes and didn't mind handing over my computer for a couple of days plus the 2 added flash drives and an email account on another server where I know this all orginated from. I was told it all is more than enough to hang him. He did it himself.

There is no crime in asking questions when somethings make you feel uncomfortable and making sure you're feeling in the norm. If people would just be honest it would leave no questions. Underminding someone when they are hurting and telling them things knowing it will cause them deeper pain is just plain sadistic. No glory or honor in that. Pathetic, and mentally ill beyond comprehension is how I see it. The plotting and masks are over and off. I can live in ease thankful I am not amongst those who seek pleasure and crusade in tormenting blood as I know to run thick and cold.

I don't mind the daily scans by MS or HP or Norton over the last week. My older kids saw what I have always known but tried to deny. I worry about my step dad

because behavior like this is out of gain not loss. I changed everything except this name. Why should I change that. I am not ashamed over having feelings, normal feelings and asking questions.

Not breaking laws, not out to hang anyone on a stake for a good laugh or just for the sake of showing others how cruel one can be. No crime in being a human being with feelings and even checking to make sure my feelings are in the norm.

Tht's why I started going to therapy to begin with. I suppose I had some hind sight to would lay ahead of me and wanted to know I was ok and would be okay.

I have good memories and so do my children. They have been hurt by this too. They love their grandfather and feel the same as I do towards the rest for what they've done. I gained knowledge in what "red.client" is. I never lost any living family member I never had to begin with. As far as my ste parent goes I never could hurt him as they claim and I have in black in white. I know what "interstate probabte" is when there isn't a Will. I never asked for anything and turned down money my step parent offered for one of my children. I would not hear of it.

The man don't have much and I could not take from anyone. I give.

I gave 2 aunt's a few thousand dollars in clothes and other things before and after my died.

Perhaps knowing what I do is seen as threat. Like my doctor said they're dysfunctional and every dysfunctional family needs an escape goat. Someone to transfer their own shame and ill feelings upon. Right now I feel damn fortunate and blessed I don't have nor desire to be like that. I was raised good and loved.

I can rest knowing my mother would never feel honored nor proud of anyone deliberately hurting another and sitting around bragging and laughing at another's pain and they're way of working it through it. I at least seek advice and have common sense in doing so. My mother taught me to pay attention and like one of my kid's said " Mom, if she was here today, she would say "Ignore Them they will hang themselves". I have some wise kids to be proud of and many thanks for thinking of and bringing me flash drives.

Now this family will have some peace and good memories to see us through. They have not lost a grandfather nor I a loving step father. So we all had questions, with extended family like that who wouldn't.
Posts: 72
Joined: Tue Jan 01, 2008 6:26 am

an awful thing

Post by changinglanes »

:) Thank you all for the support. I haven't spoke to any of them nor emailed or excepted any email. Beware of clicking on those digital signature keys...... or any picture via web. I have really learned a lot and people can write a Trojan script and hide it behind anything without you even knowing it just downloaded on your pc. These trendy new antivirus software’s can be disabled yet you would never know it, in fact the software doesn't even know it. I suggest if you don't have Windows Vista already then hold off. It has some cool features but still a lot of vulnerabilities they need to work out. I do have to give Microsoft a lot of credit because they stayed on the phone with me plus went into my pc and fixed my registry and all else that needed fixed. My pc was hijacked plus hacked into via a key logger. 3 days and 10 hrs. on the phone fixed it (as far as I can see).

Tomorrow I get to do again, whatever was time bomb was put on my pc traveled through my network to the kid's pc. At least now I know what I need to do.

I should go back to school and be an IT. :)

It gave me plenty to do while my husband was in Birmingham, England and now he is in Chicago then off to California. I told him if he keeps traveling like this I will have to get a boyfriend. ha-ha

I've also been working on some genealogy and I have found some distant relatives who are the most kindest and caring people. I cannot wait to meet them all. We exchange copies of old family photos and talk a lot by phone. I am finally out of that deep rut I feel into when my mother died. Don't laugh but tomorrow I will take my xmas tree down finally. Everyone here has been so good to me and I truly appreciate it. Thank you all so very much!

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