If You Were To Advertise Your Husband/Wife

Post by **Bryn Mawr** » Wed Feb 06, 2008 3:51 pm

Stardust;772382 wrote: I know that there are some of us on here who are married or with a loved one and know that we would never give them up because we love him or her. But as you may know, there is always the joke of "I'll advertise you for a new man (or woman)". However, if you did advertise your partner, what would the advert say?

Anyway, here's what mine would say:-

Sophisticated middle aged man, had one owner, used several times, good sexual appetite, is able to fall asleep without fail but has a problem with water works as will get up in the night. Shows a lot of TLC. Warning: is in need of a new exhaust.

I'm afraid a blowing exhaust is a common problem with this model madam.

Pheasy · Post by **Pheasy** » Wed Feb 06, 2008 6:58 pm

Well used male, slightly tattered around the edges, but good for year. Custom built, stick shift, with automatic option. Regularly serviced and tuned. One careful owner. Occasionally used for 'off-road' activities. High mileage, but still a good runner. Always starts well on a cold morning. Heated seats for driver comfort. Likes to be driven hard.

YZGI · Post by **YZGI** » Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:19 am

One used, but underused woman for sale. Comes complete with a hoover but only uses it for the carpet..

Post by **Betty Boop** » Thu Feb 07, 2008 11:33 am

If I had one, I wouldn't be advertising, I'd just be Saying :

Bring me another, this ones knackered!

:D

Imladris · Post by **Imladris** » Fri Feb 08, 2008 8:19 am

One fairly well used husband for sale.

House trained but needs reminding to put the seat down behind him, sadly still finds farts funny and probably always will.

Generally falls alseep in front of the tv at about 9pm but still retains complete ownership of the remote controls.

Eyes light up at the mention of power tools, remote controls, knocking things down and getting messy.

Has fairly simple dietry needs - meat, potatoes and some vegetables none of that 'foreign muck' i.e. pasta, rice, spicey food.

Enjoys nothing more than talking back to the tv and making really, really bad 'jokes' (his definition not mine).

Moans constantly when cold and likes to warm himself on bed companion!

Most of all is loyal, loving, trustworthy, faithful, fun and all round good husband, father and grand-father so I think we'll keep him:D