Cigarettes -things you must have one after.

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Mon Feb 23, 2009 9:06 pm

since this subject has come up, what are some things you need to have one for?

talking on the phone

after a meal

on fg

going to the doctors office

while drinking alcohol

kayleneaussie · Post by **kayleneaussie** » Mon Feb 23, 2009 9:36 pm

when i am angry or nervous

socialising

with another smoker

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Mon Feb 23, 2009 9:43 pm

kayleneaussie;1143580 wrote: when i am angry or nervous

socialising

with another smoker

those are with me also.

Lon · Post by **Lon** » Mon Feb 23, 2009 10:42 pm

[QUOTE=Odie;1143577]since this subject has come up, what are some things you need to have one for?

alking on the phone ----------chew some gum

after a meal---------------------drink a glass of wine (red)

on fg------------------------------chew some celery sticks or carrots

going to the doctors office---------------------chew on some beef jerky

while drinking alcohol----------------eat some pistachio nuts

el guapo · Post by **el guapo** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 4:07 am

to help ya get lung cancer

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 6:29 am

especially on fg!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 9:37 am

In order of importance.

Coffee

Sex

Erm, thats about it.

Terrible habit too.

Sex that is. :wah:

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 9:39 am

Galbally;1143951 wrote: In order of importance.

Coffee

Sex

Erm, thats about it.

Terrible habit too.

Sex that is. :wah:

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Coffee

Sex

Talking on the phone

Chatting on FG

I have found that a cig & a coffee in the morning get your arse on the toilet quicker.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 9:43 am

qsducks;1143953 wrote: :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Coffee

Sex

Talking on the phone

Chatting on FG

I have found that a cig & a coffee in the morning get your arse on the toilet quicker.

You know, you are totally right about the toiletary effects of having a cigarette, it does get you going down there in the morning doesn't it?? Nicotene must be a diruetic.

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 9:48 am

Galbally;1143959 wrote: You know, you are totally right about the toiletary effects of having a cigarette, it does get you going down there in the morning doesn't it?? Nicotene must be a diruetic.

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl At least it works and you don't have to take any of those fiber drinks:wah:

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 9:56 am

Galbally;1143951 wrote: In order of importance.

Coffee

Sex

Erm, thats about it.

Terrible habit too.

Sex that is. :wah: Sex with yourself doesn't count :sneaky::sneaky:

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 10:04 am

oscar;1143977 wrote: Sex with yourself doesn't count :sneaky::sneaky:

It would count because you're only using one hand:sneaky:

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 10:35 am

qsducks;1143953 wrote: :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Coffee

Sex

Talking on the phone

Chatting on FG

I have found that a cig & a coffee in the morning get your arse on the toilet quicker.

oh yes, coffee will do that!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 10:36 am

Odie;1144011 wrote: oh yes, coffee will do that!:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Yes, both get the system "going":yh_rotfl

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 10:50 am

qsducks;1144012 wrote: Yes, both get the system "going":yh_rotfl

wanna come over tomorrow for coffee and a smoke?:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

I have lots of room deodorizers.:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 10:52 am

Odie;1144033 wrote: wanna come over tomorrow for coffee and a smoke?:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

I have lots of room deodorizers.:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Sure but I can also bring some Yankee candles too.:wah: Hey, what kind of seeds did you use for that giant sunflower?

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 10:55 am

qsducks;1144034 wrote: Sure but I can also bring some Yankee candles too.:wah: Hey, what kind of seeds did you use for that giant sunflower?

mmmmmmmmmmm love those candles!

they are just JUMBO sunflower seeds, bought them at my nursery.....but when I planted the four packages...most of the birds ate them..... should have put my chicken wire over top until they grew.:-5:-5:-5

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 10:59 am

Odie;1144037 wrote: mmmmmmmmmmm love those candles!

they are just JUMBO sunflower seeds, bought them at my nursery.....but when I planted the four packages...most of the birds ate them..... should have put my chicken wire over top until they grew.:-5:-5:-5

I have a problem with squirrels so we start the seeds indoors in mid April so then I just transplant them. I also do that with my morning glories & moonflowers. I have two iron poles holding up my front porch ceiling and I plant them there and they wrap around the poles. I'll have to take a piccy in the summer and post it.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 11:05 am

oscar;1143977 wrote: Sex with yourself doesn't count :sneaky::sneaky:

Strangely enough, being perfectly frank, your absolutely right you know, masturbation doesn't actually induce the desire for a cigarette the way sex with another person. (happily I get to know the difference quite often

). Interesting though, isn't it?

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 11:06 am

qsducks;1143985 wrote: It would count because you're only using one hand:sneaky:

Having a cigarette while masturbating? I can safely say, that the thought of doing that has never even occurred to me before, thanks for putting that in my head. :rolleyes:

qsducks · Post by **qsducks** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 11:12 am

Galbally;1144051 wrote: Having a cigarette while masturbating? I can safely say, that the thought of doing that has never even occurred to me before, thanks for putting that in my head. :rolleyes:

It might be harder to concentrate but I'm sure you can manage it.:yh_rotfl

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:04 pm

Odie;1143577 wrote: since this subject has come up, what are some things you need to have one for?

talking on the phone

after a meal

on fg

going to the doctors office

while drinking alcohol

After reading spocks posts I immediately take a Xanax followed by deep compulsive drags on a cig.

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:07 pm

qsducks;1144041 wrote: I have a problem with squirrels so we start the seeds indoors in mid April so then I just transplant them. I also do that with my morning glories & moonflowers. I have two iron poles holding up my front porch ceiling and I plant them there and they wrap around the poles. I'll have to take a piccy in the summer and post it.

oooooooooooooo yes, take some pics for me!

I can't start anyfing indoors.........4 cats!:-5:-5

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:10 pm

Galbally;1144049 wrote: Strangely enough, being perfectly frank, your absolutely right you know, masturbation doesn't actually induce the desire for a cigarette the way sex with another person. (happily I get to know the difference quite often

). Interesting though, isn't it?

I never smoke after sex although i have been known to glow a little.

Lon · Post by **Lon** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:10 pm

qsducks;1143985 wrote: It would count because you're only using one hand:sneaky:

I use two hands.:wah:

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:11 pm

Nomad;1144132 wrote: After reading spocks posts I immediately take a Xanax followed by deep compulsive drags on a cig. I read Spot's post and had all my 60 a day in one go.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:12 pm

Lon;1144153 wrote: I use two hands.:wah: Sometimes i've smoked during sex as it was slightly more satisfying than the object i was with. It's why men have that dip in their backs...... god put it there for women to rest their ashtray on.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:14 pm

Galbally;1144049 wrote: Strangely enough, being perfectly frank, your absolutely right you know, masturbation doesn't actually induce the desire for a cigarette the way sex with another person. (happily I get to know the difference quite often

). Interesting though, isn't it?

Do you feel a prick when your doing it?

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:18 pm

oscar;1144156 wrote: I read Spot's post and had all my 60 a day in one go.

Have you also developed an uncontrollable nervous tick ?

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:19 pm

oscar;1144156 wrote: I read Spot's post and had all my 60 a day in one go.

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:20 pm

oscar;1144152 wrote: I never smoke after sex although i have been known to glow a little.

Yes, women do that, I've noticed that myself, not you personally of course.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:22 pm

Lon;1144153 wrote: I use two hands.:wah:

Wow, I am jealous. Two hands?

You must be "well armed". Arf arf. :yh_rotfl

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:23 pm

oscar;1144169 wrote: Do you feel a prick when your doing it?

Oh how droll.

You really should have considered a career in comedy you know.

Well either that, or perhaps sex therapy. :rolleyes:

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:24 pm

Galbally;1144194 wrote: Wow, I am jealous. Two hands?

You must be "well armed". Arf arf. :yh_rotfl

Do we really want to encourage Lons masturbatory feats ?

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:30 pm

Nomad;1144201 wrote: Do we really want to encourage Lons masturbatory feats ?

Yeah, why not, hey nomie, we're in a depression, loving yourself is free! :wah:

I'm not doing any measurements though, man to man, that just ain't never right, no time, no place. :yh_rotfl

Nomad · Post by **Nomad** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:36 pm

Galbally;1144209 wrote: Yeah, why not, hey nomie, we're in a depression, loving yourself is free! :wah:

I'm not doing any measurements though, man to man, that just ain't never right, no time, no place. :yh_rotfl

Lon flys all over the world drinking pina coladas and eating mahi mahi on the beach at sunset. There is no depression in Lon world.

He plays tennis for Gods sake.

He just wants to talk about his penis.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:37 pm

Galbally;1144209 wrote: Yeah, why not, hey nomie, we're in a depression, loving yourself is free! :wah:

I'm not doing any measurements though, man to man, that just ain't never right, no time, no place. :yh_rotfl That and the fact that you can't buy tape measures under centimetres.

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:38 pm

Galbally;1144194 wrote: Wow, I am jealous. Two hands?

You must be "well armed". Arf arf. :yh_rotfl Or well hard :sneaky:

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:41 pm

Nomad;1144223 wrote: Lon flys all over the world drinking pina coladas and eating mahi mahi on the beach at sunset. There is no depression in Lon world.

He plays tennis for Gods sake.

He just wants to talk about his penis.

:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:06 pm

oscar;1144227 wrote: That and the fact that you can't buy tape measures under centimetres.

You need to discuss that with Lon, not me. I come from good Celtic stock Ms O.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:08 pm

Nomad;1144223 wrote: Lon flys all over the world drinking pina coladas and eating mahi mahi on the beach at sunset. There is no depression in Lon world.

He plays tennis for Gods sake.

He just wants to talk about his penis.

Well let him off then, everyone needs something to talk about.

Tennis eh? He obviously didn't have his pension fund in Bernie Madoff's racket, thank god for him. I am glad someone is having a good time. Though just how good, maybe we don't need to know that much.

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:09 pm

oscar;1144230 wrote: Or well hard :sneaky:

Should that not be "well ard"! :wah:

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:58 pm

Galbally;1144278 wrote: You need to discuss that with Lon, not me. I come from good Celtic stock Ms O.

I'll never be able to find out as i've pledged myself to that old scroat gmc :yh_rotfl:yh_rotfl

Post by **Oscar Namechange** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 1:59 pm

Galbally;1144281 wrote: Should that not be "well ard"! :wah: No, he's the dog in 'Enders'. Could be 'well hung' i suppose :wah:

Lon · Post by **Lon** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 2:04 pm

Galbally;1144194 wrote: Wow, I am jealous. Two hands?

You must be "well armed". Arf arf. :yh_rotfl

Sometimes ------------ no hands at all.

Lon · Post by **Lon** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 2:06 pm

Nomad;1144223 wrote: Lon flys all over the world drinking pina coladas and eating mahi mahi on the beach at sunset. There is no depression in Lon world.

He plays tennis for Gods sake.

He just wants to talk about his penis.

PENIS?? I thought you were talking about cigarettes.

Lon · Post by **Lon** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 2:12 pm

Galbally;1144280 wrote: Well let him off then, everyone needs something to talk about.

Tennis eh? He obviously didn't have his pension fund in Bernie Madoff's racket, thank god for him. I am glad someone is having a good time. Though just how good, maybe we don't need to know that much.

With my retirement assets down about 22% I may have to scale back a bit and consider crewing on a sailboat to get back to the U.S. I guess I can forget ever getting the money back that I loaned to Bernie Madoff.:wah:

along-for-the-ride · Post by **along-for-the-ride** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 3:02 pm

:wah:

My, my, my.....................how THIS thread got derailed!

Odie · Post by **Odie** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 3:05 pm

along-for-the-ride;1144324 wrote: :wah:

My, my, my.....................how THIS thread got derailed!

sure did!:sneaky:

Galbally · Post by **Galbally** » Tue Feb 24, 2009 5:09 pm

Lon;1144312 wrote: Sometimes ------------ no hands at all.

Now you are just showing off Lon.

No hands?

Erm?

Hey, I know, lets not go here. :wah: