So let me tell you about my week. Had to go to court on Monday .....no worries. I turn up to court and see a friend and stick like glue to her for the duration of being there because I was by myself. Then I spot him . I'm thinking hmmm she must be his solicitor or something . And seated on the other side of him is his mate and housemate.
Then it all started. I didn't go into court it was just particulars being ironed out and I was to come back the next day . Had a conference with my solicitor and went home.
Guess what he did? Got the matter adjourned................Which is okay, I was fine with that. But guess where he got it adjourned to ? His old workplace (he used to be a prosecutor at this particular court) So, is this getting a matter moved to a comfort zone or is it a continuation of intimidation on his behalf toward me?
Our entire marriage has been where I'm living now ....I now have to travel over 200 km to his old work place. Could it be he doesn't want anyone around this area to hear my allegations? The Monday hearing was half way between the two of us ...would have worked well but no.
On Wednesday I was given the papers of his return allegations . At first I was in shock because I couldn't believe what was written in them...then that turned into laughter . I thought ..My god the man must actually be insane or he is desperate. Either way, it doesn't matter it will all come out in the wash. No matter where it's heard.
Oh and he has managed to reduce his child support payments. And he (I think it's his fourth change in the status of access now), never wants to see the boys on Christmas day or New Years Eve ever again ...What a nice fella. The boys are hurt by it, but I'll let it go for now.
Oh, back to the Monday court thingy. The woman wasn't his solicitor ...it was his new girlfriend. That was a bit of a shock (that he had one) But it turned out to be rather humorous. How do I know it was his girlfriend?
:D:D Because those two were the only ones in the whole court precinct that were snogging each other. At first I thought ...Holy cow What is he doing? Because i remember what he used to think of any fraternisation near courts when he was a prosecutor. And here he is actually doing it .....I mentioned it to my solicitor and I said "Who brings their new squeeze to a family court mater?" He said that in his opinion it's the height of immaturity But lets face it, I agree with their actions, there should be a lot more loving around dreary old courts. But seriously, I thought I would be jealous or hurt seeing him kiss another woman................I wasn't . It did surprise me but it was kind of free-ing in a way . I suddenly felt the world lift off my shoulders because it was always a thought "Does he have a better model?" or " should I be moving on myself?" You know, all those types of female thoughts. Well I got my answer on Monday, and I'm glad for him. In fact I'm estatic....It's good to know I don't have to worry about my actions now . I'm free to do and think and love who and whatever I want. I've been so stressed an depressed about it all but after Monday it's a whole different story . I can't explain exactly what happened but .........I"M FREE! IT"S ALL OVER!! Now he is just a man in the street (that unfortunetly my children have to have contact with, and even that's turned out by his own needs ...very little contact)
After awhile he kept passing me in the court and his girlfriend had to pass me to go to the loo. I think they were setting me up, you know coming too close in the hope I'd say something to them . ......He is the King of set ups. And I think he was wanting me to follow him outside to confront him . I didn't ...I looked them both straight in the eye and smiled. It's weird, he doesn't intimidate me anymore. And neither do his friends. I actually said to the people I was standing with . "I don't believe I was afraid of 'that'. (meaning him ) I've known this man for over twenty years now..........twenty years wasted. I don't know what has happened to me this week but I feel different ..better. All the anger is gone, the regrets are gone and so is the feeling I have to keep watching what I say and do. I really am........... free.
:):):):)I wanted to move on and date before this but when I tried it never felt right .....You know that "I still feel married" feeling? But that is gone now.
So I can Date freely now ...........Anyone?
Oh it was funny at one point on Monday The girl I was sitting with, just out of the blue says ...."I think i'm going to turn lesbian" I said "Really? do you want my number?" We both laughed then I got up to put something in the bin and accidently knocked her foot. We started to laugh and she said ....."I wasn't serious, look mum she's already playing footsies with me".....We both just cracked up laughing more and her mum was telling us to shush. :wah::wah::wah:
For all the day was ............I had a smile on my face when I drove home, and still do. I think I'm happy again.
